Quick question for black guys.

The issue may be that some black men dont have the same things in common with the black women you mentioned. they may want sophistication and success but they still want traditional dating and marriage partners. they may just not get along with many of the BW, and so its not very easy to meet the sort of BW they want. It could be about attitude and both not sharing the same attitudes. I have found that black women are not easy to approach and though I have dated them, it wasnt as easy and natural for me as meeting a WW. I found BW harder to crack. harder to get at who she was deep down inside and that I tended to find alot of them who were very nice or happy.

that was my experience, not saying all black women are like that though.

 

Pfft..I have been saying this shit for years. I posted

 

yeah, they dont want to hear you tho.

 

over, and over, and over, and over, again.

 

you want to see stupid ass thinking see BW loyalist thread....especially this post

http://www.whitewomenblackmen.com/forum/showthread.php?t=17564&highlight=loyalist&page=2

post 15.

 

I think you have to also realize goodlove some brothas have reached a point where they have said "fuck it" and checked out of dealing with with all the theatrics and drama of black women in their lives, who hold on to this notion that being belligerent is being strong.

Rather than stand around and argue with a woman and know I will become more heated I would rather just walk away from the argument to cool down and not go on with the drama.

Are so many brothas wrong when they voice their complaints about black women. Where did this come from, they didn't wake up one day and decided on these issues. There are legitimate questions that need to be asked.

 

This is exactly what some dudes aren't willing to put up with any longer, for years black women were ripping into black men. You would always see black women on television yapping about black men.

The black man ain't shit became a catch phrase, even in sketch comedies and no educated, respectable, refined black man is going to tolerate a woman belittling and talking rubbish about him.

Black men are now responding to years of what was said to and about them by these women.

Everything reaches a tipping point. The new thing is if a black man doesn't deal with black women he isn't strong enough, he is using white women, he just wants a pushover and white women will do anything, he is secretly DL and can't handle black women. Yeah that's it.

The reality is I'm seeing more and more black dykes than anything else just when I'm traveling around NYC. Some trying their darnedest to look like men on the exterior, while the other person with them is the woman I guess.

Ain't only the brothas on the DL, that's for sure. Black women need to quit the hypocrisy. Many of them are rampant lesbians as well so they aren't kidding anyone by labeling black men.

From my perspective I figure the best thing is to not even talk about black women and I'll just do me. I don't owe any explanations to anyone.

I like what I like and know what I like and that isn't changing. Many dudes have probably tried to reason with black women, but how can you talk to someone who doesn't want to listen. In their minds its never their fault, especially some of the young knucklehead women out there today who have values that are lacking.

 

rayer: rayer: rayer: rayer:

 

rep is on it's way...it appears i've slapped it about too much already today...!!!! fantastic post :smt058

 

Thx Tarsh, I look forward to the belated rep.

 

Karma a lot of those black women are themselves on the down low but the usual mouthpieces have made it just a black man thing of being on the down low. They need to be called out on that blatant double standard.

Because saying black men are on the down low is akin to the "black men ain't shit" line. Notice how its always a one line catch phrase to put down black men.

I don't deal with black women so it doesn't impact me, but I know what I have seen here in NYC. Some shit would leave the head spinning.

 

Doesn't this apply to all woman? Just saying.

 

The reason WHY is because we (collectively) have fail on so many levels. How do we expect for them to support us, when we degrade them in our culture, down them in our music, leave them to head our homes and raise our children.

OF COURSE...this is going to create an atmosphere of what you described. If they are they way, it is because we created them...(for whatever reason)

 

LOL, probably.

However white, Hispanic, Asian women aren't talking about their groups of men are on the DL to the media and saying those men aren't shit and heaven knows those cultures have had a long history of their men exercising control over women's rights and such.

 

YMRA, what I gather is we are looking at one big, hot mess of poor values and social ills.

I'm big on personal responsibility and accountability. Black men didn't create this, the policies of the prior generations such as welfare programs, led to broken homes in the ghettos, a blistering anti-black male campaign by even educated black women who spewed the mantra of not needing a black man, because black men weren't shit.

Sounds like a self fulfilling prophecy to me. So is it said so shall it be done.

You don't need a black man, okay. Brothas said deuces.

 

I was talking to a friend about this last night(she normally dates ww) and through out the conversation the one thing that I definitely took away from the conversation is that bm and bw seriously need to find ways to heal each other because we can't go on like this. We down each other every chance we get and instead of recognizing we both have pain that no one else in this world is gonna understand except us. I'm not advocating staying with in your own race when seeking a mate because lord knows my heart just gravitates to ww and I don't want to be a hypocrite. I just think compassion on both sides would go such a long way. We as bm need to understand their pain comes from a real place and makes a lot of them lash out, a lot of these chicks as well as guys never had any example of what a relationship looked like within the home. You and I lucked out but to be honest I think a lot of it comes from our parents being from different countries where men leading the family was the standard not a commodity like it is in this country and that goes beyond race here.
But that's another thing to is that bw need to learn to follow and realize abrasive reactions don't equal strength it just exposes them for the scared and lonely women they truly are. Bm need to grow up and start leading their families enough of this arrested development bullshit. We don't have anymore time for people to figure out what we all already know.
At the end of the conversation me and my friend had a very healthy long hug because there is so much bullshit going on that we don't realize we're holding on to. It's real pain and shouldn't be ignored because of shit that happened in the past with other knuckleheads.
Just my two cents.

 

This actually a fair assessment. So then what's the answer?

 

All I will add is that BW's cultural leaders are a woman with no husband and no kids, but a "best friend," and a gay filmmaker whose claim to fame is dressing as his own grandmother.

And I'm out. LOL.

 

I think there is merit to what you are saying, as you mentioned I wasn't born in America, so even though the majority of my life has been spent here I have a different background that influenced my ways of thinking. At least up until I was 12 and came to the U.S.

I actuallly grew up in a single parent household, but I knew right from wrong from the jump and never had to be told twice.

My mom raised me with certain values about what it is to be a respectful person in life.

In college I spoke to one black girl, that was the last time I made any attempt to. She was actually nice and not ghetto.

However my taste and interests evolved over time and I lost interest in dealing with young black women when I saw all the nonsense.

To be honest I don't know what the answer is and I really stopped caring. I don't do drama.

 

ROFL, Oprah and Tyler Perry.