In Online Dating, Blacks More Open to Romancing Whites Than Vice Versa, Study Finds

That's none other than your typical "white boy on WWBM". Fool joined ONLY to make that comment. Only has one post and joined minutes before making that comment.

 

Yes, you do. LOL

...65...whatever. *grumbles*

 

:smt023:smt023:smt023:smt023

Very well said hon. You know once in a while I have to pull out my history degree and utilize it when dealing with such nonsensical posts. I just feel very strongly about this subject because others who have suffered because of slavery can allow me to sit here today and be a free man.

To think I could have had the unfortunate lot of being born in the 17th, 18th or 19th century and been a slave, just because I was black. Toiling away for the benefit of others, with no reward to myself as a human being, but exists as a beast of burden for others.

On your second point I concur wholeheartedly, we live in a society where the perception of us by others is often paramount. A lot of white folks that have an interest in blacks for relationships hold off because of those perceptions of them by others. A man or woman that just says hey this is what I like and I will go for it is someone I can appreciate, no apprehensions.

LOL @ the well spoken aspect. While I think many believe they are giving a compliment, they are in fact acknowledging that they expected some stereotype of that person when they opened up their mouth.

This happened very frequently with me in my interactions with professors. It seemingly took them by surprise at my diction.

Its not that these people were cold racists, far from it, its just you can sense they had a certain expectation or stereotype that they expected you to fit in with.

 

MrFantastic: slaves were commonly forced to have sex with their mothers to ensure strong slaves that's where the term motherfucker comes from.

I sat before my keyboard without words when I read this about an hour ago. I had to leave because I was too moved to respond. Just when I think that I have learned of the worse horrors of slavery, I come upon something else. Oh God...forgive us. Fan, I will never forget this as long as I live. Every time I hear someone call a person a motherfucker, I will remember what you've shared here about that term. Oh God! Words are beyond me at this point.

I remember 2 years ago when I read about how black babies were quietly removed from a sleeping mother's arms at night and used as gator bait, I cried. I can not comprehend how my ancestors were so very wicked as to give a gator a live screaming human baby, just so they could catch the gator. I am sorry and so very ashamed of what my ancestors did and what they continued to do well after slavery. The lynchings that took place all the way up into the 60s were horrendous and many of the whites who committed these horrendous slayings are living today as free men. They were never tried in a court of law and those who were, were simply found not guilty by a jury of their 'peers' who were at the lynching themselves. Yet, America refuses as a nation to apologize for the horrendous pain and suffering it allowed to happen to her fellow citizens because of their skin color. Black people have suffered horrendous pain and who are we to try and swish it away by telling you that that is the the past...get over it. You would greatly dishonor your ancestors by putting what happened to them on a back burner somewhere. They should always be honored, spoken of and branded into the minds and hearts of your children because you would not enjoy the freedom that you do have today if it were not for their suffering.

"Being enslaved for cultural differences or religious ideologies can never compare with being enslaved because of race. Your culture and ideology can be changed but your skin tone is obvious and can't be hidden."

This statment became a billboard in my heart when I read it. Fan, this is why I wrote so deeply about why I love black men, the first day I got here. I have many black men as friends whom I have never been intimate with. I know them by their character. I will tell any woman that if all she knows about a black man is his body parts, then you have only touched the surface because what is inside is much greater than that which is outside. Though I will most likely never see you, I will add you and GQBrother to my journal of special friends because when I read both of your responses I knew right away that you were worthy of such in my heart.:smt039

 

It's good to know the history degree comes in handy. People always ask me what I do with my English and Women's Studies degree. I did want to minor in Medieval Studies, though. I love history in a way that's unnatural. We could have some great discussions, I think.

I never understood holding out on being with someone you really like just because of what other people think. I date who I like- that's it. Why hold myself back from potential happiness because one person wants to be a jackass? It's not worth my time. Besides, I could lose years of happiness by settling for the person that I'm not meant to be with and not even know it because I didn't give a person a chance.

No thanks.

BTW.. I've been missing our banter, darling! :smt054

 

LOL, definitely sounds like we would have some deep philosophical discourse.

Its all about some people being concerned with perceptions of them and being judged ignorantly. Forget that nonsense I go after what I like, my life, my choices, no one else's business.

Glad to hear you miss our little conversations. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. :smt008 :grin:

 

Unfortunately, not everyone is as unconcerned as you are, GQ. I do wonder sometimes, though, how children start navigate that sort of thing. After teaching in the inner city, something I really noticed was how sensitive the kids were to any perceived slight...moreso than students in other areas. At what point do you recognize that it's not you- it's them? Or is it a conscious decision to just not make a big deal out of it?

Aww, well, in that case.. my heart is very fond!!

 

I think its more of a self confidence and awareness of yourself as a person.

I pride myself on being open minded about others, acknowledging that people come from different backgrounds, the biggest key for me DB is respect, respect, respect.

I treat people fairly until they are disrespectful, condescending or ignorant in interactions.

For me it has to do with how I was raised, the values that were instilled in me through examples and my own personality.

Being someone who respects other peoples cultures and always interested in expanding my horizon, I am by nature tolerant within reason.

I wouldn't even say I make a conscious decision to not sweat the opinions of others on such an issue, as opposed to I live one life and I am going to do what makes me happy as a man. I don't have the patience to waste focused on others narrow mindedness, preconceived notions and ignorance.

I remember in college a white guy asked me, "you like white girls?" in a rhetorical tone, like something was supposed to be odd about that. My response to him was I like women, concise and to the point, not much to debate.

A fond heart you say, I like that. :smt053

I've been away a few days, missed me I hope, I certainly missed you. :smt008

LOL, you know I have to get a daily dose of my DB.

 

I love what you said here- in particular the bolded part. That's exactly how I feel. When dealing with my mother, I generally am not quite so eloquent- but I do tell her to put on her big girl panties and deal with it. She once asked me if I was dating BM on purpose to spite her, and I responded with 'Yeah, Mom, cause I'm totally thinking about pissing you off when I'm in bed with my boyfriend...right.' Hey, it shut her up. lol

But, I think I got to a point where I had to consciously decide not to respond to those things from strangers...otherwise, I'd never get anything done...and with my Italian temper? I'd be in jail. lol I just have always wondered how things work for other people on the subject, and it's never anything I've thought to ask.

Your daily dose of DB, eh? Honey, you haven't experienced a daily dose of me, yet. lol

But, of course you were missed!

 

That is something that always leaves me scratching my head, you often hear some white dudes saying that line, "white girls are dating black guys to piss off their parents, etc." or black guys are doing it to get back at whitey.

Like they couldn't actually be simply interested in each other, heaven forbid, must be some foreign motive to the relationship.

I think its some kind of rationalization they employ in their mindset to placate their own ignorance and prejudice.

LOL, you are right I haven't experienced a daily dose of you yet and likewise you haven't gotten a dosage from me as yet babe.

I'm not an MD but your prescriptions will certainly be filled by me, to your satisfaction. :smt008

 

LOL...ohhhh GQ, you give me fever!

 

And you love it. :smt008

 

Only if you can help me recover... :smt008

 

Aah, touché mon cheri. :-D

You're in good hands with this brotha, rest assured.