Why I usually don't look at BBW

Good to know :smt003

 

As a newbie here I have just read through most of the thread. This issue is obviously one that has caused much spirited discussion. So, I will add my two cents to the mix.

Dating and finding the right partner in life is tough enough, not withstanding the interracial aspect. There are so many dynamics in play. There are some black men only want to bang woman and aren't interested in a relationship. So, they may go after "the bottom of the barrel" in that quest. Some men want to have deep and meaningful relations and marriage with white women. Some WW are overweight and have been spurned by white men, and so they look toward men of other races, who may be more open to accepting larger women. Some WW have never dated a WM and have always been with BM. Some WW like having sex with BM but would never want marriage while other do. There are professional WW and professional BM. I could go on and on but my point is that it's often hard to find what you want.

I also think that much of what Trey said has a lot of merit, in general. There are exceptions, obviously, but the BM seem to be relating their experiences and they are quite valid. I read one comment from a WW who described herself as wealthy and was dating a BM. IMO and experience, that's quite rare indeed. I'm a multi-degreed guy and have never met this kind of woman as I believe most WW, without exception, believe that they have more options, and don't consider black men. Btw, there are statistics to support this. I don't recall the specific numbers but it showed that a black man had to be a millionaire before WW would give him as much consideration as they would a WM. It also showed that AM, who were immigrants, a different culture, were more sought after than BM. So, there is much validity to the experiences and frustrations of black men in this area.

The elephant in the room that doesn't seem to be acknowledged is sex. There are groups of people, young and old, black and white who enjoy the titillation of IR sex. It has been my observation that this drives a lot of the relationships between BM and WW. Whether it's older European women on sex tours to the Bahamas and African countries or urban WW just wanting to "get their freak on". That's not to suggest, as I mentioned earlier, that there aren't brothers just wanting "to get their freak on" as well.

I believe that if you are a professional BM who wants to find a professional, attractive and fit WW, the likelihood is small. If you are are a non-professional BM or WW, and you look beyond physical and educational parity, then I think your chances are much greater to find someone. It's just a matter of what you desire in your life, or what you are willing to settle for.

That's my take on this matter but I welcome all comments and those who would like to engage in open discourse.

 

Very fair and well said my friend. Welcome to the site.

 

Thanks Andre, I appreciate it. It's a pity that more women aren't commenting. It's obviously a shared experience among the bro's and that's why it touched a nerve. It seems to me that people should want to get this out in the open and talk about it. But, hey, at least we can express how we feel.

 

I think its because when use the term bottom of the barrel they take it very offensively. I wish more women would see the obesity thing as a problem instead of trying to cram the big is beautiful idea down our throats. When we talked about how poorly bm were doing in school most of the men didn't try to make excuses and pretend these kids were geniuses. We more or less agreed the students and parents needed to change what they did after school so the kids would get their education. Instead of trying reinvent what was considered smart we suggested the kids become smart with hard work.

 

interesting

I don't get offended by those posts, or the high HIV rates or crime stats. I just look at those areas as something we can work to improve upon. Then again, I don't fall into either category, so it's hard for me to put into writing, how someone who does feels about the situations.

If a big girl is offended, it's because she's directly linked and tired of the hate. If you did poorly in school (and couldnt go to a good college because of it), and had someone who went to Penn State or Stanford making fun of you around the clock, how would you react?

 

Bring them up on charges for harassment if they make personal attacks lol but I'm all about self improvement so if someone were to make a generalized comment about broke dudes I wouldn't get offended I would just try to get my money up. I refuse to be a whiner.

 

I have yet to see a woman poke fun at broke dudes here. But ask me when was the last time the guys piled on about BBWs, and I'll be able to tell you.

Fact is, some women by their claims (it's the internet...the haven of liars), make more money than me, but still make themselves available. It's not like they're slamming the door in my face, and making thread after thread, about broke black guys.

We'd all cry foul.

 

Oh yeah you're right but women on here can be full of shit as other dudes have pointed out. We are a lot more open and honest about our preferences. When a dude called the women out on not liking fat people either you had shit a load of pics of linebackers repesenting fat guys when they knew what we were talking about. I just think the men are more upfront.

 

I think most women didnt comment on your post because we cant really see it from your view point as we are on "the other side". Im not a bm dating ww.

On the whole topic - if you read through the whole thread, you have seen its a very touchy subject and a lot of women are quite done with the subject.

Im focused on fitness and prefer a mate that is at least somewhat in shape. A little overweight is fine for me, but not more than that so I cant fault a man for having those standards as well.

What I DO have an issue with is when this is being pushed onto others and big women are being put down as well as the men that do like their women big.
If you dont like them big, fine - but it should be left at that - it doesnt have to become a put down.
I just dont get why some people need to put their nose into others taste and damn them for it. I never will. I think that is what all the heated argumenst about this really stems from.

The whole bottom of the barrel ww is kinda odd to me. What is attractive to one is not to another. Its in the eye of the beholder, it should be left at that.

 

Andrae, your not getting it. Petty is very fair in his last posts. He gets it.

Its not about "being up front" about it - it is way passed that. Its one thing to not like big women, its a completely different thing to put them down.
Men, on here have not just stated they dont like big women, its has gone to straight put downs and also put downs of men who like them big.
THAT is the issue, not - not liking big women. No women on here have an issue with some men not liking big women.... its about the out downs.

If you cant see that, you are blind.

There has not been a case on here when the women have been putting down broke men or fat men or the likes.. I dont want to date a straight overweight man, but I really dont see a reason to put straight overweight men down either..

Its not about being NOT being"upront" its about being respectful. There is NO need for the put downs of big women. Period. The discussion about big women here is not "upfront" it has been down right disrespectful.

That my dear lil bro, is the issue, not that some men dont like big women.

 

FG my friend what your blind to is that the men never put down big women. No one called them names in fact in this thread there were more shots at skinny women by big chicks.
In this thread a whole bunch people just griped about weight issues as it pertained to them and their experiences with it. There wasn't a ra ra we hate fat chicks parade going on. Its just the minute weight is discussed people become hyper sensative just as when race is discussed others get hypersensative.
People gripe about their experiences they don't like or praise the things they do like on this forum. Again I say if you don't like it leave it alone. The women started a thread dedicated to hot men of every race and even though I'm not cool with it, I stay the fuck away from it. Get it?

 

look dont drag me into this shit

that's between you and 'Dre

 

That is not what happend. that is not how it was percieved by the women.. you can wring it the way you want. There was bashing, in several threads. Period.
For you to call them hypersensitive is really extremely unfair. And its not making it true just because you wrote it. For the bigger women to react to what was written in several threads is not hypersensitive whatsoever.

And for you to try to compare it to that hot man thread is plain silly.

Im gonna stop here because it is pointless. You are being unreasonable and unfair regarding this. I regretted my post to you the moment I posted it.
LOL

and Petty, I will not drag you there - but I will drag you back to your ecorner

 

Fuck it I'm done with this thread. Did you read this particular thread again? Because since we're in this thread I thought we were talking about what happened here.
Anyway fat women are hot and should praised any man who doesn't see it is wrong. The end.

Edit: I will say this in general a lot of fat people are weak whiners. Instead of fixing a fixable problem many get offended about the slightest criticism. Yes some can't lose weight but that's very fricking few. You put 1000 fat people in a room maybe 20 can't lose weight because of medical problems the other 980 won't because they're weak and others enable them by deluding them and calling them pretty or good looking. They are literally dying because of their food addictions and or lazy behavior but its easier for everyone to play nice and pretend like its ok. I'm not going to claim to be altruistic by a long shot but I'm honest to the core and won't sugar coat a fucking thing. And if I hurt anyones feelings oh well buck up and be strong. Get on a diet plan and work out until you are no longer fat. No is saying to be a super model just take care of yourself. I'm not saying this because I'm hateful or even because I care just because I want to.

Dueces

 

I love you, GEEK. You really could be an uncaring B about women with weight issues since you don't have one, but you are a beautiful wonderful person about it, and I am so honored to know you.

 

i agree...the wife is an amazing person...she's kind, thoughtful, caring, understanding, intelligent and HOOOTTTTT...!!!

 

Cosigned-ed-ed-ed.

:smt024

 

wooooohooooo....!!!! i love me some jaiseeeeeeing

 

LOL, dont give the gloria yet Kuno.

Fair is fair.. and that whole thing was so plain wrong.

and thank you!!! right back at you Kuno btw