Cheaters

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:smt033
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Please stop playing dumb. Good life to you as well Christine.

 

Didn't want to start a new thread...but his comments are...

strange to me...

 

exactly it is her decision. it is funny when people get caught up they want to blame everyone else and then get mad when people dont trust them. I would still be careful dealing with a married woman cause that can get you killed.

A friend of mine told me her dad got popped for messing with a married woman. he was like 33 at the time and has been carrying around a bag to piss in. he has to have his family to care for him. his wife left him after he got popped. I said in my mind I dont feel sorry for him because he knew she was married.

you reap what you sow.

 

Yo, if they want to chance coming after me, & not sticking with giving their wife all the anger & hatred they now have, good luck, I definitely won't go silently lol

 

LOL. Im just saying ... people dont kill logically. If anyone that needs to get popped was the wife...she knew she was wrong. Im just saying....bullets know no names

 

Oh, well that's not a problem, a lil engraving and good aim can't take care of that lol

 

:heart:

 

LOL

 

:smt045

 

Bookie, I swear, if I had an extra $550 to give you to get your divorce, I would definately do it. No one should have to wait that long just because of money...I'm glad you are able to be upfront with the men you have dated and they have been ok with it. Says a lot about you and your choices...

 

the word your searching for is FOUL!!! amongst others. its just not even plausible under any circumstances. out of bounds for real!!!!:smt073

 

Amen my friend

 

Thank you sweetie! :smt058

My financial situation is just utterly ridiculous right now. I switch from crying about it to laughing about it. What else can I do right now? Anyway, I appreciate the sentiment. Maybe my financial luck will change for the better soon.

When I can, I'll put whatever I can afford into a box and save it for a divorce.

 

there's always room for pole dancers

:smt033

or you can donate ovaries

 

LOL!! No one wants to see that!!

 

your last girlfriend was a ovary donating pole dancer...????

 

I know Bookie, let's put on a pole dancing show to raise money for your divorce....there's enough ladies on here that would be willing to do it I'm sure...and I'm sure there are enough men who would pay to see it!!! :smt007

 

I'm probably going to sweat some heat on this thread because I have several issues with the way this conversation (or limited lack thereof) has gone... While everyone is entitled to their own opinion, I believe this thread should have been more appropriately titled "Sound Off On Cheaters", since the overwhelming tone has been negative toward "cheaters", and suppressive for/toward any who would dare to offer an opposing view...

So let's cut to the chase...

If we take the word "cheater" at face value, the word in itself implies a very negative image of someone engaged in dishonest acts for personal gain or as defined by the freeonline dictionary: "To deceive by trickery; swindle: cheated customers by overcharging them for purchases. 2. To deprive by trickery; defraud: cheated them of their land" or per dicitionary.com, "to deceive or practice deceit, especially for one's own gain; trick or swindle (someone)"... While the definitions are decidedly narrow for the purpose of this discussion, at the base of the definitions is the intent to deceive; deception.

In committed relationships, no matter how dry the ink is on a piece of paper, no matter how sincere the words of eternal love are spoken and conveyed, no matter what the expectations are of fidelity, monogamy, honesty, and whatever other values a couple expresses, expects, or places on said relationship, anything and everything is possible and subject to change based on the couple.

I'll be the first to admit the presence of "snakes in the grass", deceptive people with ulterior motives ( "people" because I don't believe the label is gender specific or that all of the culprits who merit the label are male), but I do believe that each situation is unique unto itself and the true story is often clouded somewhere between what the parties involved really say, said, really know, knew, and really meant...

It's really easy to condemn any cheating couple who does the deed when the facts are kept to the basic facts; One or both of them are in committed relationships to someone else and said couple bumps uglies and the world learns about it...but is anything in life that simple? How many bad relationships do you know of that ended with handshakes, smiles, and mutual understanding about what went wrong, what was wrong, and even more importantly, who was wrong and wronged? For that matter, how many "good" relationships ended without bitterness on one side or the other when infidelity was the central issue?

Whenever deception is an element in any human interaction, and that deception is discovered, the "prey", the victim feels justifiably angry, abused, and (personally) foolish for believing the deceiver... We all want to believe that we were taught better and that we knew better or should have known better.

When one is living inside a relationship where the other is dippin elsewhere, well meaning friends can give the victim the GPS coordinates, but the victim is usually in denial or acceptance or both... In my personal experiences, the victim doesn't want a best friend to pull the covers off the bed, even if the victim had a roadmap leading to the third party. In my experiences, the victim will attack the messenger and anyone outside the inner circle who would suggest infidelity of a partner, even if the victim already knew...

If we leave out the psychopaths, the demented, and the other warped sociopaths that prey on opportunity, weakness, and troubled relationships for their booty calls, that still leaves people in committed relationships, who for whatever reason, feel the need to creep... In our mind's eye, we may have been perfect... the perfect partner in the perfect relationship, and thought everything was "perfect"... But in the cases of the creep or cheat, the truth be told, even with all those GPS directions (cause those same friends try to leave hints at the first sign of trouble), some of us miss turns, stops, and detours that would have saved what we treasured most.

In the case of infidelity, it takes two, unless it was forced, and then it takes big people and counseling to get over ego and trauma... But if the partner was that precious, was all that... after a serious look in the mirror to "make sure our own hair was in place", isn't forgiveness in order?

My grandmother used to have a saying when she would punish us... "Fool me once, shame on me, but fool me twice..." and then the hammer would fall...

I'm not defending infidelity, and real parasites deserve to be exterminated in my book, but if the purpose of this thread was dialogue and or confession, the initial tone and ensuing general agreement (I'm not neglecting the voices who those weighed in in an effort to promote discussion) left no wiggle room for open conversation...