Workplace Romance - Yea or Nay?

It's another topic that's very much in the news as I write this...

...and because of past events that Yours Truly has personally witnessed over the years, it's somehting I've been footballing around in the ol' cerebral circuitry for Some Time Now.

The Question:

How do YOU feel about it.

Have YOU found YOUR Happily Ever After at YOUR 9-to-5?

Or have/did things crash and burn for you?


I, myself....on the 1st day I started making Dollar One at my 1st job....made a SOLEMN VOW to NEVER pursue relationships with ANYBODY in the workplace.

It pretty much worked out to my personal advantage...at least as far as my stint in Cleveland, Ohio was concerned.


And I *did* personally witness some events that'd--to quote flaminghetero--turn your hair whiter than Doc Savage..

Case in Point #1:

Jimmy & Darlene

In 1992, after being with Police Radio for 7 years, Jimmy met the new hire Darlene. They became engaged 1 & 1/2 months after meeting, & 5 months later they were wed.

His 1st marriage...Her 3rd (Her 2nd one brought 2 daughters into the world)

They shared the same house (of course), as well as the same shift, the same dispatch channel, having the idiocy to 'french' each other in public and on duty..

Sometime later, for reasons (apparently) unknown, and out of left field, Jimmy asked one of Darlene's friends (female work buddy) was Darlene flingin' with a Sergeant in the field.

I never did find out the answer to that, but ennyroad...as things transpired..

He whipped her head.

She left him.

She returned.



He whipped her head.

She left him.

She returned.


He whipped her head.

She left him.

They divorced.


The marriage lasted all of 1 & 3/4 years.


And then..


They got back together again.

Under the same roof. This time at her pad. Hitherto, they were living in his abode.

Then one night they both got soused..

He whipped her head..


It gets worse...


He dragged her out into the street for all the world to see her being clobbered.

Somebody called the cops, 6 cars showed up (Including a Sergeant & Lieutenant), and Jimmy celebrated is 40th Birthday weekend behind bars..

They both returned to the job that Monday.

They never spoke to each other again.


Jimmy remarried, and his 2nd wife died of cancer 1 year later.

Of Darlene, nothing more is known by Yours Truly.

Just as well, I guess.



Case in Point # 2:

Bickerstaff & DeRita


Bickerstaff was originally a dispatcher who met DeRita (grandfathered/mothered in by her Mum, a senior personnel) in Radio. He later went out into the field and maintained contact with her, and a relationship blossomed.

She was never told that he was already married.

Not separated or anything like that...but (apparently) solidly married.

His wife got wind of it and personaly demanded DeRita nix it, or ELSE.

DeRita, a young 24 to Bickerstaff's 31...freaked out and overdosed, and ended up in hospital.

Some time later, Bickerstaff convinced her that "She's talkin' stuff, Babe..We ain't together no more..we're splittin' up for ttrue..It's cool.."

They ended up canoodling at his place late at night.

His wife came in on them after a night out with the girls.

Next morn, DeRita's Mum got a call from wifey proclaiming "Look, Punk Ho! If That Slut Bitch Comes ANYWHERE Near MY Man EVER Again, I'll Burn HER Ass, And Come Up There And Burn YOURS, Too!"

DeRita got word of that encounter...and overdosed and went to hospital again.

To make a long story short, her Mum got her OUT of that job,and OUT of the city...and had her shipped of to Kent to attend University...FAR AWAY form ANY PARTS of Bickerstaff, if her Mum had anything to say about it.

Personally, with that kinda crap that place was nuthin' but p that went on....there were other incidents too..but those were the most prominent & above board...that place was nuthin' but Peyton Place with a Badge!

Granted, not EVERY workplace relationship ends up like those 2 examples...

But it just doesn't work for everyone obviously.



So what's your take on it, Compadres?

Any kinda Daily SUN - ish goings on where you work or have worked?

And do you? Would you?

As far as Mellisa & I are concerned, we met WAY off premises of my job. And though we oft times work together, she hitherto had NO knowledge of or association with the entertainment industry when we 1st met.

But that's a story for another time.




'Nuff Said!!!!























OpinionsCartoonStudios@Yahoo.Co.UK

 

As I rememer from another thread, most people said don't shit where you eat.

 

VERY inspired quote...

Thou wouldest please furnish a link so I mayest findeth it, yes?


Or...as me and a couple of pals (and one former colleague from aforementioned workplace) have agreed...

You Don't Swing Where You Pull A Paycheck.



'Nuff Said!!!!





















OpinionsCartoonStudios@Yahoo.Co.UK

 

It depends on the job and your position in the job.
For me, I'm still a student so I'm only working part time, so getting involved in someone else working part time in a shop or bar wouldn't be a problem for me. However, if it was my full time career, I absolutely wouldn't get involved with a co-worker. Too much to risk. Especially getting involved with someone in a higher position, like a supervisor or boss. Just asking out trouble there!

 

http://whitewomenblackmen.com/forum/showthread.php?t=14387&highlight=boss

There you go good sir.

 

Most men and women cannot handle romance, phucking or flirting in the workplace. I've done it successfully twice, but I knew the two chicks would be able to handle it. Luckily I was right...

 

Like I said in the other thread, that shit is all bad, but if it's your boss, that's bragging rights to your boys.

 

naw dont get my romance where I get my finance.

she would have to be damn bad as hell and the CEO. If she was a Halle berry or a Demi moore then they can sexually harass me. I will endure

 

i did this topic already.....

http://www.whitewomenblackmen.com/forum/showthread.php?t=14387

 

AMDB, it seemed to me like none of the bad shit in either of your examples had anything to do with the couple being from the same workplace....?

I dunno, it's probably a bad idea for a fling, but I can't imagine turning down someone I was falling in love with just cos we worked together...

I did have a fling with a co-worker once and we just went back to working together like nothing happened. So it's not always bad!

 

Well it depends what your getting into with the person and what kind of Job they/you have.

I have had a relationship in the work place, it didn't end badly there was no big show of fireworks, I just drifted off and found something I thought was better for me.
I was an Assistant Manager at the time and he was my Branch Manager, it was actually quite a gratifying exsperience, also we did get together independently off work, we thought people didn't know, but to be honest it was obvious.
Plus the extra bonus of not being giving the shitty jobs to do was cool,

Like he would purposely avoid giving me the Item safety checks report, because he knew I hated filling in all the tiny columns and my lefty handwriting was always too big to fit, he was very sweet.

The only time we came close to fighting was over a customer believe it or not, well they were decomissioning some mill towers in our area and we were the closest Branch to supply the gear needed.

So we get these Abseiling guys who do it for a living decending on our store on a regular basis, picking various equipment, ordering it, staying to chat or have coffee and a biscuit.

One asked me out a number of times, it became a thing with him to see if I'd say yes, then one time the friend kicks in saying I should be quick as there was a woman at the Mill who liked hiim, but he was holding out for me:smt042

I just laughed and made some saucy remark, like.... you wouldn't know what to do with me.
He was so angry about that, not a happy Bunny, anyway that was the closest I came to feeling uncomfortable.

 

Maybe it's the bitter misanthrope mode of mine coming to the fore....

Being that the Police Dispatch Centre was pretty much a high-stress establishment....plus the fucked-up attitudes of *most* of the people there overall (See my other commentaries on Cleveland, Ohio) kinda fairly much soured me on any relationships, freindships, fraternising, and/or other associations with said colleagues.


Out of all of them... there was *one*....**only one** that I took a liking to...she was an EMS Paramedic (Now an officer in the field) and she was White & all for IR's like *I* am..

I wouldn't say *don't* to *anyone*, Luv....it's a free society (for the most part) and anyone is welcome to do whatever they please...

It just was not for me...for reasons already mentioned above.

I've seen a couple of marriages or LTR's blossom from workplace associations (at the studios I've worked in, mind you...NOT the C.P.D.!) and they got along rather good.

It just depends on who you are, who they are...and the environment/circumstances prevailing...


But I'm *always* gonna remember *this* disturbing little fiasco that I heard about some time back:

http://www.9news.com/news/article.aspx?storyid=87435


I'll carry the memory of that all the way to my grave.....



'Nuff Said!!!!























OpinionsCartoonStudios@Yahoo.Co.UK

 

I think we did this thread already fam

 

Somewhere, yes....I just wasn't able to locate it..

Plus, I kinda wanted to have a *poll* accompanying the gig...and this was the only way I could do so..



















OpinionsCartoonStudios@Yahoo.Co.UK

 

what would be the best come back to that for a man . the reason i ask because im not sure how to gauge that.

i believe it would be good to say something like " I believe you would know what to do with me (with a sneaky smile behind it)" would that be a good thing to say.

also how about when a woman says something that is sexual on a date. the trap here is it could be to see if you have no discipline or u just for one thang or whatever. how would you advice a man to handle that set-up?

 

I say if it is a part time throw away gig where you just trying to get some extra cash then cool. if its the job that pays the rent then fuck no.

 

I don't get the game playing, speaking in riddles, and hidden meaning crap. I really don't. I just am entirely too straight forward for that. If I say something, I meant it exactly as I said it, no need to try to decipher what you think I might have meant. Seriously who has time for that crap? If I say something sexual to a man, it means I'm thinkin' about sex, end of story.

 

trust me....people do it all the time. not all people but i have ran across alot. I was trying to get with this one woman...she was hot. she was about 50 years old. she stated something like you like a warm hot woman.....

I responded "Im no different from any american man"

she replied " you see you men are all the same"

I was like woman "you brought it up. I was helping you with your essay paper and you came out the blue with that."

granted we talked on the phone and went out for brunch date but I dont make a move until I can see an opening or I get a vibe to do so. if i dont i would just get a little mackish to see whats up and go from there. so i didnt do a thing to prompt the convo. you dig what im saying

 

If you play the game with her, you only enable it is what I say. I like to be straight forward!

 

yeah. you see what i mean as it was a trap question. Im very str8 up. i would say things in a smooth way but u know what is up