Light Skin Men or Dark Skin Men...which do you prefer?

Some subjects are taboo with some people. I discuss racial issues with my friends all the time, but they know the place where I'm coming from. It would be nice if we could all come to a comfortable point where we can openly discuss racial injustices, divisiveness, differences and the like, but not everyone knows how to have a civil discussion nor do they even want to touch on those issues. I do agree that we need to talk about it in order to heal.

 

I appreciated your post and I understand what you mean and agree with you on the sensitiveness about the different topic. I don't believe that it's easy to delete history or anything, but I think that if you (not you IB, in general) really want to keep a taboo, you will keep it and find many justifications to keep it. There are things that can be done to break them. Just, some people don't want to or don't have any interests in breaking them....

 

If you break a taboo of sorts, that requires change and some people are uncomfortable with that. It means self-reflection or introspection. Depending on the topic.

 

Sure it does. Social workers fight against taboos all the time, lol. I'm just saying that some taboos become a usefull thing, so some people have no will to make that change.

 

What taboos would you say are useful Thick?

 

I see what you mean with this TS. If a person benefits from the existence of a particular taboo, then they would be more reluctant to change it, especially if that means they would no longer derive the same benefit.

 

I would love to have these conversations with friends. But yeah some people just can't handle these type of discussions.

 

I'm not telling that. don't want to be told I'm a racist bastard from sensitive people, lol. Maybe it's more about prejudices and stereotypes than taboos. Still, some ppl don't want to change them. My thought.

That's exactly what I meant. As always, you can translate in english the things I can only say in englitalian LMAO

 

LMAO @ englitalian! I knew exactly what you were getting at.

 

Most of my friends are BM, so this comes easy I guess. I talk about stereotypes and IR dating and all that good stuff...lol I really value those conversations too. Very healthy to have.

Maybe you should try it with someone you know who can handle it.

 

Well being that I started this thread I welcome everyone to be open and honest. I don't want it any other way otherwise its all pointless.

 

It's always struck me as weird that you can call someone a friend but you can't speak openly. That doesn't sound like friendship to me.

 

I know, but I think when it comes to racial issues, it's a whole different ballgame. Like we've said, some people can't handle it. It can cause arguments etc.

I know I recently had a discussion with my friend and I've known her for years. We've always had open discussions about race, but I felt weird going there with her. I don't know if it's cause we hadn't spoken in a while or don't hang out as much or what.

 

I tend to agree with you on that. Anyone I'm friends with gets my standard 'you never know what's gonna come outta my mouth' disclaimer. However they also know there is no topic that's off limits. I don't do restrictions with people, if you can't take me as I am, then we have no business being friends.

 

Agreed

 

Yes it is. People easily get there feelings hurt or believe you harbor resentment, or playing divisive games yourself by bringing these topics up, when in fact your trying to the opposite.

 

Exactly.....

This goes along the lines of, "Don't start none, won't be none"....

 

Yeah I have buddy of mine(Black guy) who I have discussions with. Open minded like myself, willing to debate and look for solutions to problems in our Society.

I have also had discussions with other minorities as well, but never any White AMERICAN people though(Europeans are a different story). Kind of sad imo.

 

We know who we can discuss what with....

I think with me, I go there with people who I know will understand (whatever color they might be).

Maybe you can try it out on some White person who you're cool with, just to test the waters. I don't think it's fair to chop them up to not being able to discuss something, not understanding or being open-minded enough. You never know what someone believes....

 

I'm lucky to have the people on here such as you IB