I get so mad I sometimes. I really do hate G-d at times

I get so mad I sometimes. I really do hate G-d at times. fuck em

Some of you know what crap I have been going thru.

-Divorce-she cheated stole 17g's out of my acct and
-depression. it was so bad I did not even know where I was for about a year and a half. during this time I signed divorce papers and did not know it
- have not seen my daughter in almodt 4 years because the mom will fite you every step of the way and still fighting me.
-she committed forgery and ruined my credit.
-lost 2 jobs since then
-cant afford an atty . they want THOUSANDS UPFRONT. the BW ATTY's aint shit. FUCK EM

I sit here and think. I was trying to be a good hubby and good father and follow G-d. Now I see truth.

No matter how much you try people will fuck you.

G-d is an ASSHOLE. you try your best to do what is rite and he helps and let people fuck you.

why even try anymore ?

You know how many times I cried myself to sleep because i miss my baby.

FUCK G-D. THAT ASSHOLE. FUCK HIM.

 

arent you suppose to be this religious guy who is studying Judism and getting converted to it? wow what happen?


I am not gonna front, I used to have a love hate relationships and moments with my God b4 as well.

Hope you find peace brother.

 

yeah well I found out he hate those who follow him. he is an asshole. i mean look at the shit. I just gave an abbreviated version. no details at all. he is letting that woman get away with murder.

I had to mail letters to the sheriff and all just for them to investigate.

G-d was no where in site to help me.

Now that she done all this shit she call herself a child of G-d. she never stepped into a church when we was married. when we was married i was the one doing thus saith the lord and shit but he is letting her get away with shit.


what the fuck is wrong with him. what about the one who there from the beginning and tried his best to do no wrong. FUCK him

IT is real easy to be patient but let someone hold your child away from you

 

G-d has a great sense of humor I'll give him that much.

 

Wow I can tell you're frustrated fam but God has nothing to do with this my friend. I know you feel alone right now but you arent . The road is long and ardous but you'll find your way man.

 

I used to get mad at god for fucked up shit happening everywhere, but then I said "why am I wasting my time on something I lost faith in a long time ago?", and just stop believing. Now I just say, "that's just the way goes. The world is fucked".

 

goodlove:

I have been through my fair amount this year too(which I won't go into cuz it's a hell of a lot) so far - however, instead of turning from God, I am running to him. It is NOT his fault people behave this way, we often forget this. People will do as people will do.
What you have to do is get mad at the people who are hurting you, the people who are causing you problems - and not at God as the one who caused it. We are given our own free will, and what we do with it is what we do. I understand you are angry, but somehow in all of this, God will show his way through it.
Trust me, I should know. My family is currently dealing with the fact that my cousin(like a little brother) shot and killed his father a few months ago.
Yet, I still turn to God because I know it's not GOD doing that. It's other forces in this world. And through all this, my cousin has been finding God, even in jail. As a family, we are stronger than ever. My aunt had the same feelings when it happened. Angry at God. How could He let this happen? How could He let her son do this?
The answer is that God didn't.

The situation you are in sounds awful and never ending. But do not blame God in this. Blame HER for being the awful person she is. And claiming to be Christian like that is NOT right. It is her, NOT God who has caused this.

 

Firstly, I'm sorry to hear about your family situation, Ladyblaze. My thoughts and prayers to you and your family in this really tough time.

Goodlove, I agree with the bolded part for sure.

The only person's behavior you can control is your own. You have to let go of what she did to you. You have to. You can't move on with your life until you do. You have to forgive her and then move on. Your life will get better.

But it can't when you're stuck in this holding pattern. Yes, a lot of really bad shit happened and is continuing to happen to you, but focusing on the bad things that happened in the past is not doing you any good.

You have to look to the future. You have to learn to forgive her for what she has and is continuing to do to you. You can't give her power over your life anymore. Right now, she holds all of the power of your entire being - spiritual, emotional, etc.

Take control back over your life. The only way to do that is to forgive her. You don't have to tell her you forgive her, but you need to make peace with your past. Once you make peace, a clearer road will open up for you. It will.

It happened to me. I forgave my ex for all of the terrible things he did to me and to our daughter. I didn't tell him I forgave him, but I did. I HAD to, for my own emotional well-being. I feel so much better not hanging onto that emotional baggage anymore. It's a freeing experience.

Please, do what you need to do to get past this pain. You can't make your life better when you're looking at the past and agonizing over what has been. You have to free yourself of the negative so that positive things can happen.

I wish you luck in your journey.

 

Very well put "theladyblaze". And you are of course 100% correct. God is NOT the author of confusion, and never has been. I sympathize and empathize with everyone at this site (or in life in general) who has gone through difficulty. People do have free will, and they unfortunately, excercise it inappropriately at times. I speak as a man who, eight years ago, lost his $38,000 a year job, all 3 internet businesses, a $140,000 dollar home, and his fiance', all in a space of about 6 months, due to circumstances entirely beyond my control. I literally went from having just about everything I ever wanted to being homeless, sleeping on a mat, on the floor of the Salvation Army. Angry, frustrated, and completely unhappy with God for allowing me to go through those things (I am a practicing Christian, and have been for 37 years now) I too fussed and fumed for several months. But the hard reality was and is that God NEVER left me. You couldn't have told me that back then, anymore than you could have convinced Joseph (old testament) that being sold into slavery was part of God's plan for his life. Joseph's situation was one he probably would not have chosen for himself. My situation is not one I would have chosen for myself either. But, later, Joseph became Prime Minister of the land. The only person with more power and authority than Joseph, was the king. I'm no longer homeless, or sleeping at the Salvation Army. I'm in the process of starting up another business. God DOESN'T leave us. But there are times when we go through periods of trials. He's still there...:smt059

 

Great posts LadyBlaze and Bookie.

I've been one to not have faith in God sometimes too, especially when times have been really hard, but you can't do that Goodlove. If you're converting, you need to seek some sort of solace somewhere. You're letting this eat you up inside and now you're taking it out on God and that's wrong. Go talk to the Rabbi or something. I'm sure he'd be able to advise you.

 

Amen Bookie. Really like what you wrote here.

 

Keep your head up, it is clear that you are going through a major sh#tstorm right now, but keep in mind, tough times never last, tough people do. I wish you well and hope for the day when you can have your child back in your life.

 

C.S. Lewis said it's important to remember God is not a person. You're holding this being, who pretty clearly is not omnipotent, omniscient, and omnibenevolent responsible for all things. Does God see the individual sparrow as it falls in a swirling chaotic universe, or universes, and if so, what would the nature of such a god be? I don't think that kind of thing's motivations could be understood.

My own opinion:

- It's worth $17k to be rid of the bitch.
- Depression is terrible. I've been there. If you're out of work right now, go to your county health department. 9 out of 10 times the head nurse practitioner is a hot WW and she'll help you work out a mental health plan.
- If you really want to see your daughter, the mother cannot legally bar you from it.
- Bad things happen. I'm sorry.
- See above.
- See above again. The WWII English had a very good attitude about destruction; there simply was no other choice but to pull oneself up by the bootstraps and start rebuilding. My credit is rotten and I have medical debt up to the wazoo, but NO ONE wants to hear me bitch. Not even me. All I really know how to do is go back to school after applying for some grants and try to go into a field I love and where I can get a job. I don't have a job or a great love life. Boohoo for me. ;_; A lot of people don't. My parents are getting divorced essentially condemning my father to die alone. Oh well.

Life is hard and it's your responsibility to make the best of it. No one will do it for you: Not me, not fairies, not elves, not G-d.

 

Sorry you have lost your faith. God doesn't tell you to just sit there and wait for things to happen. You really have to believe and move in that direction.


Go to legal aid. If you are unemployed you should get help there. There is no reason you shouldn't have some visitation with your daughter unless there are things in your past that are that bad you are forgetting to tell us. If there really is nothing then you will not have a hard time. I have been thru a divorce and yes it's not easy but you have rights.

 

i dig what you are saying. i slept in my car for a year then found a job but left my job because everything was going crazy and i did not want to go back into depression and now im homeless again but now im going back to school to be a teacher.

im still fuming because i still have nt talked to my daughter. i try to call but no answer. you know what is up with that. i had to fight with the cops to do something and had to fight with my former employer to try to train me and i quit. overall i feel betrayed and alone. yes betrayed and alone.

 

yeah i have to get help legally.

i wnet to schedule an appt with the county mental health because Im scared to go back into depression.

I hate that i have been betrayed by some many. it really hurts

 

Im trying hard with limited resources.

 

You've received some very good advice from several people here Goodlove.

I'm sorry you have reached a point where you hate God, I cannot even begin to fathom that. I know everything happens for a reason, and all is according to His plan, and that includes the bad in my life. Knowing that it's all part of the whole, makes me realize that I need to trust in Him and be content regardless of my circumstances. Regardless of how bad my life has been, I have never been without faith and hope, nor do I think that's even possible for me. I wish that's something you felt as well. It doesn't matter how bad it gets as long as you always believe it will get better. I understand that sometimes hanging on until that happens takes more than you think you have in you, but you're wrong. Regardless of what you think about yourself, that you've gotten through what you have thus far is indicative of strength.

Based upon my personal experiences I believe that:

1. The stronger you are, the more opportunities you'll have to use that strength
2. Giving up is never an option
3. There is a certain amount of bad/evil that exists in the world, and it will find an outlet, so yes bad things do happen to good people
4. God is ominpotent and all knowing, He is aware of every pain you experience and every setback you suffer, and that doesn't mean He doesn't love you, it just further illustrates #3
5. The people who mistreat you will have to answer for that at some point. What they do to you is on them, how you react to it is on you. Letting them turn you bitter and jaded is giving them too much power over your life. You let them make you miserable, and that's something they can't do without your permission. They can damage externally, but in order to affect you internally, you have to allow that.
6. No one said life would be easy or fair. Romans 5L 1 - 4: ..."And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope."
7. You will encounter difficulty in your life, but ask God for the ability and skills to deal with it and He will provide that to you. He will never put more on you than you can bear, but sometimes you may feel like you get pretty close to the breaking point.

Regarding your daughter, I'm sorry you don't get to see her. As a parent I can imagine the pain that must cause, and it's inappropriate to use a child as a weapon. But as Jordan pointed out, you have legal rights and you should pursue those. I believe you mentioned you were in Alabama? If so you should contact legal aid for assistance. The organization below offers legal assistance to people who cannot afford to hire a lawyer, and they do handle custody cases. Contact them, and fight for your daughter. Her presence in your life would make a tremendous positive difference. I wish you all the luck and will pray you find peace and contentment.

Legal Services Alabama (statewide assistance)
207 Montgomery Street
Suite 500
Montgomery, AL 36104
Phone: 334-264-1471
Phone: 800-844-5342
Fax: 334-264-1474

 

thanks. i can use those numbers. i will address those other items you discussed later

 

I am not religious at all, because I think every one is responsible for his own happiness. But never it would come in my mind to speak out a sentence like that...Whatever you do or what others do- is your or their own responsibility-people are on earth to learn and to accept and to go on their way, to develop themselves and maybe to be better sometimes. If you want to make God responsible for anything- than it is the facing of our own weaknesses and cruelty.