a black father's pain

I agree. I think if a parent wants to spend time with his/her children and the children want to spend time with them, limiting it to a preset court schedule isn't necessary. Ideally two adults ought to be able to work it out and share the parenting even if they are no longer together. However, there really are an awful lot of parents that can't seem to manage that.

 

yes thats true. I did however talk to one guy where they were doing that but the court ( the judge ) stated no you are doing it this way.

he told me he was going to get another judge. stated he would have just done it between him and the ex but he wanted it on paper.

i believe they dont have to go before a judge they can write it up themselves.

 

I believe that the judge has to sign off on everything, and that includes the custody arrangement. The parent's can work it out beforehand, but if the judge doesn't approve then he can change it. At least that's how it works in Oklahoma. They try to take a very balanced approach to custody arrangements here and they don't favor either parent unless there is a reason to. However if the child is 13 or older, they can tell the judge their preference and that is taken into account.

 

i think that is BS.

if the parents agree to letting the father see the child m,tues,wed, and every other weekend. then the judge states no i want it this way.

now i think thats stupid. if the parents want it the way they want it for the sake of the child then cool.

if there is a disagreement then cool the judge should step in or if there is some very odd parents or very odd situation then yeah.

but for the most part the parents should be in total control of when they can schedule the visitations.