Pick-up artists/Seduction Gurus

Sadly she passed away when I was 9, which is a little early for dating, so that never came up. However my cousin was married to a BW and so IR wasn't really a shocking occurrence in my family. My grandmother was also part Native American, a fact which she hid very well due to it being viewed as really shameful at that time. It's unfortunate she ever had cause to feel that way, she was a really great woman, and she didn't owe anyone an apology or explanation for anything she was or anything she did.

 

Agreed. But you know what kinda of society we are tho....... Anyways, let God bless her soul and may she continue to watch over you.

 

It doesn't make you an idiot it truly makes you beautiful my friend. God bless you because people like you are far and few in my life.

 

another good point. I guess a person needs to tailor themselves to the environment. when in rome do as they do. also you can tailor yourself but not lose yourself.

 

oh come on now.

lets say your at the store or the club with a friend and you see a guy and I know for a fact you are going to say " girl he is hot looking" you will never say " girl I can see he has personality "

you know why ? because you have to talk to him first to see his personality.

 

You should never assume you know what I'm going to say, or anyone else for that matter. Judging someone by what you think they are going to say or do is almost always a bad idea. But in that situation, I'm not going to approach him regardless of what he looks like. He's going to have to come to me, and when that happens it doesn't matter if he looks like Djimon Hounsou or Lil' Wayne, both would have an equal shot and the guy with the best personality is going to win, hands down. It's not that I don't recognize people with features that I would consider attractive, I'm not blind after all, it's just that it's not what matters to me. A pretty face is just that, a pretty face nothing more. A great personality is the sexiest attribute a person can have for me.

Rather obviously this is typically true, although I would like to point out that you can tell a lot about certain personality traits just by observing someone. Self-confidence for instance is one that really stands out, as does arrogance. However since I'm not going to pursue him, this point is moot.

 

Not always, some can play/hide it very well.

 

I wish I was more like you espy. I am obviously physically attracted to someone first and then I learn about the personality. This has got me into trouble a few times though I have gone on dates with gorgeous men that turn out to be really controlling and just basically have an ugly personality it sure does put you off. But I do think it is v.hard to tell someone's complete personality from just one encounter, especially as some people act to impress.

 

Yeah I'm with you. I really don't like the idea you can't find a good interesting person who's hot. It's like people make it seem as if you have to pick one or the other.

 

I like your honesty, Brit lady.

 

That's what you think GZ, I'm rarely surprised by anyone, in fact only one time that I can think of.

 

I'm just like you. I HAVE to be attracted to someone, if not, I can't progress any further. The dudes I like don't have to be gorgeous, I just have to be physically attracted to them.

I agree. I think they can co-exist in one person. It's just hard finding that.

 

So much for inner beauty lol

 

LOL Shaddup!

Don't get me wrong, I'm really big on personality and it's extremely important to me, but I have to have that attraction first. I'm shallow in that sense I guess, yet people tell me I think like a man in that way.

 

I had to make the joke sweetheart lol. I'm with you though. Without physical attraction there is no relationship. How can you have sex?

 

I know...lol

Back in the day, I used to get into debates with my friends. I had this thing where I called it being "Sparked". I'd always say I'm not sparked, I don't like him etc. They had guys who grew on them. I said that always backfires with me. I think you need to be sparked to have sex. I guess it's those pheromones. They had guys who grew on them who they weren't initially attracted to them. If you're repulsed, well let me not use so a harsh word, but if you're not turned on, it will come back to haunt you. Well, yesterday, one of my friends who used to debate me, finally agreed with me. She was thinking of going out with guys she isn't attracted to. I said, "You were turned off by someone you were attracted to and liked" and you want to go out with someone who you're not attracted to?

 

That can only end in resentment and cheating. Passion is totally key.

 

I wish you were there during my debates...lol

I knew I was right all along...:-D

I literally feel it when I'm sparked. That adrenaline is such a great feeling. I love feeling like I want to throw that man down on the bed or how I want to hold hands with him and walk near the ocean. Whatever the case may be, it's crucially important.

 

You can learn or grow to love someone but I am not sure if you can grow to have passionate sexual relationship with someone you initially not attracted to

 

Right, but sex is a very important part of a relationship, so you need that.