Patchwork

Do you wonder yourself sometimes how careless women choose their partner?

What do you think about women with two or three children from different men?​

 

Good questions Christine. I am not convinced that it's carelessness that influences a woman's choice in partner. Qualifier: I am not a sociologist nor a psychologist but I would like to guess that nature and nurture play a role in her choices. There are many women who choose a parter similar to their father or father figure and of course many who seem to completely randomly choose someone or get chosen more accurately.

Regarding children from different fathers. There are likely more men with children from different mothers out there since many of them aren't supporting their munchkins it's easier to "spread the seed" so to speak. Those women made a conscious choice to bear those children to fruition and as long as they and the children are healthy and happy, fine. I do believe that new male partners put a LOT of pressure on women to have children that they can call their own.

What do you think?

 

I think a woman has to be very careful, who she chooses as father of her /their baby.., For me, I get pregnant, so I have to take care that it won´t be, if I don´t want to.

It is for me difficult to understand, how women can have different children from different men. I am 43 and was just one time pregnant. That I lost it has to do with an accident, but that time the pregnancy was intended, wished.

A woman has to learn to differentiate between an affair and true love, very quickly, otherwise she´ll have a lot of problems in her life.

 

Good questions, Chris.

Yes, I have wondered what the hell criteria careless women use to select their partners. I've concluded that they use their hearts, not their heads, and any rational thinking at all is based at best only on short-term thinking.

Women with children from 2 fathers - I've seen examples of them being very good mothers. These women made a poor choice in their first partner, a failing I hope they rectify by the quality of choice in Man no. 2. Still, it depends on the individual situation, you also have some pretty bad specimens of motherhood in this demographic.

Women with children from 3 - here I draw the line. I have almost nothing but contempt for them. Again, there might be some worthy exceptions, but they will be very, very few and far between.

 

I don't know why but you really annoy me. Not really this post but in general. Although, it shows in this post too. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

 

Probably because I'm not the type of man you can easily manipulate, as you alluded to in that other thread.

I suggest you put me on 'ignore' if you're so sensitive.

 

Not sensitive, I really don't care that much. Not enough to put you on ignore.

I just don't get you. Not really sure why you're here - kinda like me joining an Asian women/black men forum.

Oh, and you're horribly arrogant and judgemental.

 

Appparently you can't. As you weren't going to bother, I went to your profile, hunting for the 'Ignore' function, I find out it's not available.

Look, just actually ignore me, then! The old-fashioned way. You see one of my posts, you keep scrolling down. Not difficult.

 

I actually know a woman who has 3 kids from 3 different men. One of whom is my ex.

I can tell you that she used the men to get pregnant for child support money. She sees her kids as dollar signs. It's sad.

This is just one example. I know not all women with kids from multiple men are like this.

I know that if I am blessed to have another child it will be with another man, so I'll be 2/3 of the way there. LOL.

 

Bookie I'll be in the same boat as you.

I must say that at the time when we decided to have both our children, my husband & I had been together for 5 years, and we thought that we were going to go the distance. I would love to have another child which would then put me in the category that you're talking about, but believe me, when I decide to have children, it's certainly not because I'm careless.

 

Nor does it make most women careless, who happen to find themselves in our position.

But, going on a case by case basis for a man who wants to date a woman who has kids from multiple partners is probably the best scenario. I can understand a man's hesitation in getting involved, but not everyone in that position should be labeled as careless.

 

You are a wise lady. I respect you for being able to aknowledge it from this angle.

I already know why. The main reason some women choose poor partners and have multiple illegitimate children is because of self-esteem issues and/or not having a good male role model in their lives.

Despite many putting on a mask of confidence and independance deep down they don't believe they deserve a real man that will respect and has the tools to care for her and children. Many times they don't even realize or feel comfortable aknowledging this as being the root to their behavior themselves.

While many are decent people otherwise they just don't have the capacity to think entirely for the situations they are putting their children in because they are too caught up battling their own inner issues.

No offense to the single mothers out their because I know there are many great ones and plans in life don't always work out perfectly as we plan them. I am alluding more to the women that continuously end up in bad situations with multiple men/kids.

 

Soo true- to be honest, I love your posts!

 

I DON'T MEAN TO PISS OFF ANYBODY BUT SOME OPs ARE STARTING NEW TOPICS WITH A SENTENCE OR TWO AND THE MESSAGE BOARD IS NOW A CHATROOM RIGHT ???????

 

Huh?