Could This Be ONE of the reasons Why We Date "Out"?

So I've frequented a particular dating website in recent months. And time, and time again, I have come to notice a constant theme which is unfortunately based on a racial divide.

Below are two common, and typical email replies I will receive daily.

Email #1.

Guess The Race:

"Hello from England to California

I loved reading your profile - I like 'edukatid' men!!!

Just been over to Ca a few weeks ago - nice place you got there lol. i was in Santa Monica for a bit.

Have you ever been to England???

Hope we can have a chat..."

Email #2.

Guess The Race:

"i read your profile and egaads, you're a little too throwin' out all the sexual innuendos in and out and up and over and around in your profile. so i'm gonna give you a pass.
someone out there will surely dig every bit of you..."

Now, me being openminded, I try not to discriminate when it comes to talking to women, be it black, white, or otherwise, but over the course of time during my participation on a particular dating website, I've noticed that a "certain" race of women often seem to be much more receptive, easygoing, open, and possessing of a sense of humor, while the "other" race of women seem to be much more critical, condescending, and devoid most any kind of sense of humor, or understanding of wit, unless you're funnyman Jamie Fox, or Cris Rock, and you're at The Comedy Club.

Well,

In my experience, it seems black men are almost proned to date outside the race, if by no other cause, than by default. Because who doesn't love a sweetheart in a woman.

So to all of you guys out there who may get the evil stare as you're out with your girl, don't fret, because everyone knows how it at least in part, may have led to that.

 

So the chick in email #2 emailed you just to let you know that she wasn't interested?

What a waste of time for both of you.

 

"Egads"? Not sure about the OP's entire point at all, but I can add one thing; NO Englishman says "Egads" unless he is auditioning for/rehearsing the lead role in 'King Lear'.

Take it from an Englishman.

 

The second email, I'm guessing, is not from an englishwoman. There are two different people represented in the OP. :smt023

 

That's correct Book!

Please Refer To Post #4

Thanks Bookie.

 

Interesting observation.

I love reading about peoples internet dating escapades, I find it very interesting.

 

tweety bird has always been one of lippy's favorites:smt049

 

Well it goes like this for me --


I'm open to anyone that I connect with, shares similar values to and am attracted to.

I never like to make generalizations based on race but to be completely honest in my personal experiences alot of young BW my age have worse attitudes and a much different value system than a woman should deserving of a shot with me. That being said, don't get me wrong-- I have came across plenty of repulsive WW and plenty of nice black ladies that don't fit the common trend I run into at all.

If a BW and I click and I am attracted to her then I am definately open to her. I just have to be honest with the trend i've seen: and it has pretty much has held true everywhere I have been. Even with supposedly "educated/decent" bw.

That being said I never feel "forced" to date outside of my race. I don't want WW to feel like they are a second rate option or an alternate plan for me. A white lady is neither a second or first option for me: A GOOD women is a first option for me. It just so happens that the majority of the time it is a WW that meets those standards.

So in conclusion, yes I have definately seen the trend you have seen but I won't make a blanket statement in regards to BW or WW in general. I wouldn't throw the decent BW under the bus like that nor would I give the non-deserving WW credit.

Edit: By the way, i'd have to actually read your profile to tell you if I think the second email was out line or not. I'm not just going to chalk it up to race.

 

Exactly.

I'm not remotely interesting in seeing his profile, but for all we know she could've been on point.

 

Good Post!

Yes, I'll agree, there should be no generalizations whatsoever, and I really hope my words don't come off as seeming like I/we are left with a "Second Option" in WW, because I, just like you, do share the same, or very similar values as far as choosing a suitable companion, regardless of skin color. But me speaking strictly from my own personal experiences, over a period of a lifetime, and not just in the online dating segment of it, I'd have to say, my above example is pretty much how it goes for the most part.

Viewing my profile is sort of irrelevent, as I can say, I've never had even one WW lodge a complaint in regards to what is on it, in fact, most all find it to be rather endearing. But very rarely can the same be said for the all too seemingly, and at times, mostly critical other women.
*Trying Not To Generalize!*

Like you said, we both notice "A Common Trend!"

 

To be fair. Afterall, I did start this thread, and also to give the ladies an opportunity to critique my profile to which is in question.

I'll show the text of said profile, as it is online verbatim.

Me:
I'm charming, and witty. (Well, at least I hope I am!)
?
I'm interested in meeting two... Oops, I meant "ONE" ideal companion. (Whew, That was close!)
?
I am very well endowed... (Umm, on second thought, let's scratch That)
What I meant to say was, I am very well "EDUCATED"!!!,
And I'd love to apply everything I've learned on YOU!
(Ahh, maybe that didn't come out the way it was supposed to)*EEEK!*
?
Finally!
?
I really like humor, and I looove romance. But I also know when to be funny... (In the living room), and when to be romantic... (In the bedroom), and when to be both... (I'll just leave "THAT", up to your imagination)! Hummm...

Let's start with a simple aquaintance, and see if it may just lead to something amazingly MORE!

 

Hmm...gotta say, now that you've shared it with us, I'm going to go with the woman in email #2.

The sexual innuendos completely turn me off and any guy who even alludes to his size makes me roll my eyes.

This isn't a profile that makes me want to contact you. I can tell you're joking with the things you write, but I'd still keep going if I was on that site.

Too many sexual innuendos for me = only interested in one thing.

Like that girl in the second email says, you'll find women into that, but I'm not looking for that. Not that you're asking, LOL, I'm just saying, if I'm on an online dating site, it's not for a fling, and it seems as if that's what you're looking for.

In either case, good luck to you!! :smt023

 

Thanks for your input Bookie. And even though you say you'de personally be turned away, at least you also see the lighthearted humor in it. I do realize that no two women are the same, and what works for one woman, may not work for another, so basically, it really doesn't matter if a guy comes off this way, or any other way, because there really is no universal way that works for 100% of females. So I'll stick with what works for me 75% of the time. The rest are really not meant for me anyways, given my humor, or lack thereof is offensive to them. So if they are turned away, then that clears the way for the one's that do get my brand of jest. That's the acceptable reality. I can live with that, because those are the ones I want to be talking to anyways.

Why just later again today, I received this unsolicited email. Now mind you, this is definitely NOT from a slutty, or "unattractive" (subjective) woman.

"I like your approach, and witty, well that works for me. And a decent guy (if true)well, that would be awesome! I just reactivated my profile after being off for a bit, I thought I'd give it one more try)The ball is now in your court, so tell me more!

 

I Got you. I am completely with you then.

This isn't particularly over the top in my opinion. You made it clear you were joking and that this isn't what you are really about. Not saying I would set mine up like that personally but I have no idea why the women in email number 2 would go out of her way to respond. I wouldn't look to deeply into it. The only worry I would have is attracting the wrong TYPE of WW. You know the ones that are only on the walking dildo hunt and are too dense to get your humor. Either way, if it is working good for YOU then that's all that matters.

 

I liked your profile..I though it was witty.. but... to put it in perspective.. why dont you add a few lines of what you are looking for in a woman and what a few of your interrests are?
That way, the whole "inuendo" thing automatically is toned down a bit..
Just a thought...

But that wasnt your point with your post.. ..

I cant believe someone feels the need to write you to tell you they are giving you a "pass" - sheesh....

 

Greetings,

I am writing to inform you that I don't like your profile nor your sense of humor.

Sincerely,

-Me

 

Dear me,
I am deeply concerned and will cry endlessly out of concern and deep regret that you just didnt like it.. gasp.. the horror.. I dont ... know... what... to .....do.......that was the sole purpose...

 

I understand you are trying to be humorous but after reading this I really wouldn't know much about you. Like what are your interests etc. I think you should add a bit more really. Are you looking for someone serious or just a sexual encounter? It's confusing from what content you put in.

I wonder about her contacting you to say she doesn't like your profile. Maybe she thought she was doing you a favor albeit she was a bit abrupt/rude.

 

Nice Tips FG, thanks.

If I continue on that site, I will definitely keep this in mind.

"*You must spread some reputation around before giving it to Los Angeles again!*

This is kind of similar to what FG was saying. So I'll obviously take it to heart, because if two have said it, then it can't be wrong.

I assume she contacted me, so as to voice her disapproval, because elsewhere in my profile I have only one racial preference checked. I do have the "Other" box checked too, but not "A/A". So... :smt021

I guess I had it coming.