Why Do American Women Keep Doing This?

Re:

Hi Seychelles,

Thanks for your reply...your words have helped soothe my anger a little bit, although I still strongly believe that it's best for me to find a woman either from my continent or from the Caribbean. I think that's the best bet, because it seems to me that no matter how good I may be, I still would never be good enough for most of these American women. It doesn't matter how polite, nice, refined and well-mannered you may be. If an American woman thinks you don't fit her type for some superficial reason, whether it be because she thinks you're too skinny, too intellectual/educated, not thuggish enough, etc., she still won't give you a chance. They talk about men coming on too strong, yet at the same time, if you don't take a chance and make a move on a woman who you find attractive, someone else who's fast enough will. Sometimes if you don't try, you don't get anything. What do these women want people to do? I wasn't raised in America, so it's not that easy for me to fit in with their own ways of doing things. I was raised in a family and culture which stresses the importance of being polite and respectful; respectful to authority, respectful to wives, husbands and boyfriends/girlfriends, elders, even the homeless man on the street.

I was raised to always be humble no matter what you have, and to give to the less fortunate because you never know who you might need help from in the future. You may look down on someone today and tomorrow, that person becomes your boss. What goes around comes around.

But unfortunately, in American culture, especially in dating as in a number of other areas, being polite, respectful and nice, especially when you're a man, is viewed for some silly reason as less masculine and weak. Courtesy just doesn't seem to be a very big thing in a good number of aspects of American culture and it just appears as if a very good number of American women are way, too cut-throat and superficial for my tolerance at this point. I mean, what's happened to basic manners? I can't count how many times I've held doors for women in this country (especially women walking behind me from a distance) and they don't even think I deserve the faintest "Thank You." I used to experience that a lot with many of those rich, spoiled white female students at the Catholic university I attended for a year as an undergraduate student and it really used to piss me off.

I now understand why a good friend of mine from Nigeria, after listening to my experiences, continues to tell me repeatedly to this day that I'll be better off with an African woman. He's right. I respect myself, I think I have a lot to offer the world and great potential, and I can't keep letting these flaky and superficial women think they can talk to me or treat me as if I'm not good enough for them. I'm not going to tolerate that. It's not going to happen.

 

Oh well. I'm glad for you. Best of luck !

 

Hey Mr. G !
I enjoyed our chat too, but it wouldn't be fair to "take a wild guess"o on your personality based on your posts since I chatted with you and my perception of you now is........enriched

 

Re:

I wish I could meet a white woman someday who thinks we all run after them as black men just because they're white, or who think they are doing us a big favor by accepting to date us and abandon their racist, white skin priviledge. I will tell such a woman my mind. White women are not superior human beings or a superior race of women. They are just as flawed as everyone else. It's unfortunate that I had so many bad experiences with American black women, but trust me, if things didn't turn out as bad with them, or if I had met a good, African woman earlier on in my life, I don't think I would have considered getting into an interracial relationship with a white woman. I'm really not hot about the idea of any white woman thinking I might be after her just because she's white and who under normal circumstances wouldn't consider me good enough for marriage or a longterm relationship because of my race, but thinks I'm a piece of meat walking around with a big, long dick and nothing else. Even worse are those who might enjoy some kind of thrill from turning a black man down because it strokes their egos and reaffirms foolish stereotypes. Not to mention having to deal with the pressure of parents who wouldn't want to accept me as a possible fiancee/husband.

I think that if I were to ever get with an American, white woman at this point, she'd have to be really different from the ones I have met in the past. Looking at it critically, my experiences with white, American women have been just as bad as those I've had with many American black women-same bad attitudes, same superficiality, same shallowness. To me personally, they aren't any better.

 

Tucker, how do you know these women on the street are liberal?

To be honest I figure the conservative women would feel that way to black men.

 

He must have esp or something,hell a woman can be liberal or conservative and still not give two shakes about black people. Also I think he like to drive home the point that he is a conservative black man, not saying nothing is wrong with that to each their own.

 

hmmm Injer, why dont you let me answer for myself? first grade, me thinks.

because it is a very liberal city and these women mostly hate conservative things. So I was speaking about that group that I know of here in my city, probably not in your city but for sure in mine

 

I second this post.

 

Re: Thanks a Million

WHEW... you have no idea. I've been reading through this conversation and thinking to myself while agreeing with mostly tuckerreed this whole time, you've been here 8 YEARS and didn't know of this yet???

I guess school is in session for you now.

 

Still holding on to the first grade remark huh, let it go I apologized,but you are still generalizing the women I am sure not all of the liberal women dislike blacks or conservative. Lighten up man it was a joke. I know you don't have esp or do you.

 

Tuck, my man,

Where did you get all this wisdom? How old are you if you don't mind me asking? The things you have said make me think that you are at least 40, but I am pretty sure you are no where near that age.....Anywho, throughout this particular thread, your advice is gold.

Don't do anything crazy, like go to another website, I might need you for advice one day sensei 8)

 

Tuck does give good advice shaft should listen well.

 

Re: Meeting Women at The Gym

It is what it is, furthermore, it's unusual for YOU (or any other white woman in here for that matter) to have a problem with our opinions just because you somehow believe that they affect all of you as white women one way or another, not to mention the fact that you're NOT EVEN AN AMERICAN.

Well, that's too damn bad, because it won't be the last, and it's HIS OBSERVATION, as well as HIS input, and it was written for a reason.

You just answered your own insipid question, along with throwing a tantrum for no reason about it, and as well as 'getting over ourselves' is concerned, people like you and the reactions you give are more the reason NOT to get over anything. Maybe you should take your own advice on this one. :roll:

Maybe she's a lot like YOU instead.

I guess you enjoy being a bitch to black men, like you're doing right now, and yet, we are the ones who think that the world revolves around OUR skin color? Especially after YOU wrote all of that shit? :roll:

I think I speak for all of us about how soooooo sick we are of white women like yourself coming in here and writing posts like this over the smallest things.



Talk about jumping to conclusions.

 

And this gets old as well. :roll:

 

Re:

Based on the content of your posts, I believe you already have met them.

Remember my first post in here?

 

I have to say, Shaft, though I enjoyed reading your posts (as I usually do) in here, tucker has given you the best advice (in my opinion) out of all the other posters who gave you good advice, such as nilan, Genuine, Moskvichka, and Seychelles.

 

I just want to add one thing.

I guess the whole issue of IR is that we're all "exceptions".

We ended up falling in love with someone of another background, and now have to solve cultural issues. Do we choose a partner based on their background, or we fall in love with the individual and accept their background as part of the package? I guess it depends on the situation.

Today I came across a Russian article in a conservative Russian women's magazine (that used to be aggressively Communist during Soviet times but now is aggressively religious :roll: ).

The article was in defense of Russian men - addressing all the women who are thinking of marrying out.

I love Russian men to death, but when I saw the article I was like damn, are they doing that bad? Well... the article is a piece of work and I posted it on my other forum in the humor section. It gives 10 reasons why Russian men are better than foreign husbands.

1. They are better looking.
2. They are more "gentlemen"
3. They are better lovers
4. They are more democratic (meaning less patriarchal and domineering)
5. They are more generous!
6. They are more "homebodies"
7. They are more fun!
8. They are more intellectual
9. They are more sensitive and kind

Here's reason #10 in its entirety:

"RUSSIAN MEN ARE BETTER THAN FOREIGN ONES BECAUSE THEY ARE RUSSIAN! Ours. Our native born ones. Predictable ones. Born and raised by Russian women. We know what to expect of them. They think with a Russian brain. We know them. We understand them. We live with them. So why shouldn't we love them?"

You get my point. These things are important to this woman, and I'm sure she's making some lucky Russian guy very happy. But, not all Russian women are looking for things listed in Reason #10, (and I personally think this mentality is a seed that can grow into a tall xenophobic and even fascist tree!) I wonder, WHY did she need to write this article - to promote the Russian family and increase our shrinking population? I'm afraid much bigger measures are needed for that to happen.

 

Yeah, Mosk, you summed it all up pretty well about the current conditions of Russia. :roll: They are doing so well, and yet, that nut felt the need to write an article like THAT one. :roll:

Maybe she isn't familiar with something known as 'Mail Order Brides'. They are more RUSSIAN ones than Asians and Latinos. I really wonder what's her expert opinion on THAT...



and, I pretty much agree with everything else. 8)

 

I'm digging out more old topics today Nostalgic week for me.Lol.

Anyway I also do believe this is nothing only American women do but women all over the globe.Not all of them but some here and there.

I personally try to find it hard to use people for anything.If I don't find a guy attractive at all I usually try to find a way to politely even decline the invite for a drink so I won't wake any false hopes. I'd consider that unfair

 

I've been off the market for a long time, but as a teen I used to give out fake numbers, only to the guys who refused to take no for an answer. There are guys like that, who will keep after you even after you've said you have a boyfriend, no matter what. If it got to the point when they were following me, I'd just give them my brother's number. When I got a little older, I learned how to say no more definitively, and it was no longer a problem.

I think letting a guy buy you a drink without being interested in him is disgraceful. I knew a woman like that in college. She always wanted me to go to the club with her and "scam guys for drinks." I told her I had a boyfriend, and she said she had one too, but that the scamming was fun. I don't even know how someone like that operates. If you're having fun manipulating people, how do you not know you're a worthless shit?

Guys absolutely do similar things -- like sleeping with a woman and then never returning her calls -- but when they do, most of society recognizes them as being assholes. The girls that do this are assholes, and should be recognized as such.