Long distance relationships

Have you ever been in a long distance Ir relationship? How did you make it work?

 

Yes I have, it didn't work but there's always next time

 

No.

 

yep been in a few, currently single so am guessing they didnt go so well, lol

 

Yes I have, it worked and we are now married:smile:

 

I have before and it didn't work.
Now, I've sort of been thrown into a long distance relationship. My boyfriend and I went to the same university but now that uni has finished for the summer we've gone back to our hometowns which are three hours apart. So we get to see each other every 2 weeks. It's not so bad but since we used to see each other every day it's a bit of a shock.
Still early days though, so I'll tell you if it works or not!

 

Only one and it didnt work.

 

For how long were you doing the longdistance???

 

I did and loved to do it again.

 

Long distance relationships for me are a massive fail. Need a lot of dedication and trust. I personally don't believe in them but different strokes.

 

I am in one currently, DC - LA. About 8 months and its a great relationship and its working great!
We both travel for work and work a lot of weekends so we can visit eachother in different cities. We txtx eachother every morning and some days we speak several times a day and sometimes it takes a few days between phone calls as we both work a lot. But when we are together, NOTHING is allowed to interfere and I truly have neverfelt so supported by anybody even though he is so far away...
How long can we go on like this?? I dont know, but for now - it works splendindly - but we were sort of in a relationship before the first date - we both KNEW it was right.

At some point I guess we have to have "the" discussion,but Im not ready to go there yet as it takes a while to get to know somebody long distance.

So far we havent even had a fight - we really do communicate well and we both are straight shooters and say whats on our mind so that diffuses things before it blows up. I think that is important especially in along distance relationship as you have limited time you can spend together.. you dont want to part on a sour note or have arguments over the phone...

 

About eight months, I was in Australia, he in America.

 

Wow, that is loooong distance - so tell me - when did you two have "the" talk and how did you move forward. Just curious as Im at 8 mo in a long distance relationship.

 

Um we met online and spoke loosely about the move pretty early on... then when we met in person, when I flew over here to see him, on the first day we knew that our feelings were rea;, so we decided then that I'd come back, but didn't decide on when and how. So I went back home to Oz (In November) and we continued our virtual relationship for about another two months before we could handle it no longer and I booked my flight, for Feb. We married in April and here we are now, sickly in love and deliriously happy!

We took a HUGE risk, not knowing eachother, personally, no where near enough in order to warrant such a big move on my behalf, but it was one of those situations where we both went with our hearts and hoped for the best.

I kinda think that the distance was somewhat of a blessing too, as we got to know eachother, I feel, on more of an intellectual level, with sex not coming in to it and taking away all the warm and fuzzies like it does sometimes when you are in a real life relationship and spend too much time together at the start. It was also so exciting each time I got to see him, the excitement at those times was worth all the lonely times we spent apart.

Before my man now I had been seeing another american (what can I say, I like americans!) for about a year or so, and it was good, we had some fun times, but he was not serious enough about me for me to continue wasting my time waiting for him to commit. Funnily enough, once I broke it off, he was then ready to commit (typical!) but I needed him to commit because he wanted to, not because he didn't want to break up.

 

I am in one. We dated for a year before he moved in Feb. He comes back a lot, but we hate it and he is looking for a job here.

 

That is a beautiful story! And it warms my heart to read it!

I agree that long distance is a blessing of sorts... we spend a LOT of time talking about all sorts of stuff including religion, politics and much more - so we get to know eachother in a way that perhasp a regula relationship would not allow. You are more aware of the time and the effort it takes ot make it work.. I dont know - but I do feel that I know my man in so many ways and we are truly very very much alike - we even finish eachothers sentences.

One thing you might not learn fast is the cranky sides of eachother.. and if some of that are dealbreakers.... I think the feelings we have for eachother are very genuine and that we both are adults and realize there are bad sides - as Im sure you two also thought of. Did you discuss such things??

One thing that complicates my relationship is that he has two kids and is not moveable, I would have to move... and I would - but you hit one thing right on the head..... one has to comitt because one wants to not because they are afraidn to lose you.

Im so excited for you! I think it is awesome and I would love to hear more
Where do you live???

 

Let's see -

Bakersfield - 99 miles away

Grand Junction, CO - I think 467 miles or something

Phoenix - 357 miles

San Diego - 92 miles (should have left my then GF for this one)

Ventura - 53 miles

What I wouldn't give to date somebody that lived down the street for once.

But given what's going on today, not an option, I'm going East but I'll go down South first.

 

i have done long distance quite a bit...probably because i am fortunate to travel for my work often...i don't need to date someone down the street because i am not home that much and when i am home i don't have much time for dating...my home life includes a teenage son that not just anybody gets to meet...i could easily do what i am doing right now for another four years until my son gets out of high school...at that point i may look at dating/relationships differently

 

I'm in one right now...we are separated by nearly 1,000 miles and it can be tough sometimes. I think it is harder on her only because I tend to think about things one day at a time with the big picture in the back of my mind while she always thinks about the big picture first. In person our chemistry is even better than it is on the phone which is good considering we have excellent chemistry in conversation.

We miss each other but I think sometimes it helps when you can not physically be with someone. You learn more about how the person thinks and you can better differentiate strong desire for someone versus actual love. It tests how insecure you are and how much you truly want that person. If the only way you can love someone is by always being in their face, then you may not love the essence of that person as much as you might think.

 

well said young man! I 100% agree. To me distance is not a deal breaker at all. So you live apart.....there are worse things. As long as you are open and honest and have a plan (if you so desire) to be together eventually they can work out. I am an eternal optimist.