Men financially supporting women

This is a spin off from another thread that is beginning to lean towards a discussion about men financially supporting women.

I would like to know if there are men who realize that not all women care about your job, your income nor your status? In fact some women, like myself only care that you can support yourself and are happy with what you've chosen to do with your days.

Just a little vent because I am soooooo tired of being lumped in with folks that like to live off the avails of others: "I ain't no pimp". :smt018

Cheers.

PS. this thought of mine does not include someone (woman or man) staying home with munchkins - totally different story.

 

I am in agreement.

 

i agree as well...unless a woman has little ones at home and the cost of daycare cancels out a large percentage of what she would make...then no man should be footing the bill 100%...it should be a partnership that you both are working towards a common goal...that's what building a future is all about...:smt045

 

ditto . I did not work until my kids were in school full time and I was done with coleege, as it was finacially prohibitive with the cost of daycare.

 

No woman ever has to worry about me financially supporting them.

The aforementioned can be read in two entirely different ways.

 

I believe each couple should decide for themselves what works for them. The whole idea that if a wife stays home, she is sponging off her husband annoys me.

I know a lot of stay at home wives, and for each wife who chooses not to work, there is a different reason. Just as I am not going to judge a sister on her career/employment, I will not judge her on her choice to be a stay at home wife.

Two men at work have stay at home wives. They are easy to pick out if you didnt know. They never come in wearing a shirt that is wrinkled from sitting in a dryer too long, their lunches are always nicely packed cooked meals. The only fault I can find in being a stay at home wife is people do not see the value in it anymore. If your marriage doesnt last a life time, no one will remember how hard you worked to keep the family going smoothly, they will see you as a sponge. Someone who deserves nothing because you are not as valuable as someone who clogged the freeways in a mad effort to make a dollar each day.

 

I agree. I don't want a guy financially supporting me either. I like having a job, making my own money and the independance it gives me. I'm the kind of woman who believes a couple should have three bank accounts...one for him, one for her and a joint one for the home. Meaning, they keep some of what they earn on their own to do with what they like.
Make sense?

My man, on the other hand. :roll: He's Kenyan (kikuyu) and he has told me "in my tribe, the women don't work". I straight out told him that I like working and wouldn't stop. He HATES that I "have" to work. LOL Not that he wants me to quit for him, just feels bad because the men are the bread winners in his culture and he believes it's his duty to take care of me.

 

So true!

 

This is so very true. It hits very close to home. My husband provides well for us. I couldn't ask for more financially. However, he hates his job. It relates to his degrees (Chemistry and Math) in no way. He wants to teach math and coach youth sports. He's a damn good coach and does it for free through the parks and rec. Kids and parents love him. During our soccer season he's looks and feels "alive".

Two days ago he came home from work and told me he'd talked with his advisor at the university and was going to go for his Master's in Education. It'll be a long road and he'll have to take some more undergrad courses first and he'll probably make less in the long run but I am beyond excited for him.

 

you seem koo
you got a sister?

 

Well I take it to mean you are well off and can support her without her needing to worry about it!! That is really sweet of you satty!!

I agree - it should be a choice they make together, depending on goals they have individually and as a couple.

Personally I would love to have a man who wanted to support me and who could afford to do so. But that would never be a deal breaker if he couldn't do it. Just knowing he has the desire is enough really, it makes a lady feel like she's not alone in the world.

I don't mind working to add to the common goals my guy and I may have, but if I had to work to pay the basic household bills I may as well stay single.

When and if I ever remarry, I hope I can spend my time focusing on my guy, our home and having it nice for us. I would love to spoil him a bit, not rush with the laundry and meals, that sort of thing. When a woman works it makes it hard to really spoil her man.

 

Yes, I do. She's 5'11, childless and an ex-model. She's also 47 and on her third marriage. She's pretty high maintenence.

She may have gotten the height and the looks but I have the brains and the heart.

 

People generally see what they want to see and rarely challenge their initial perceptions.

 

Yeah, i took it to mean that a woman would never have to worry about it, as it would never be happening.

Optimist versus pessimist. lol

 

i agree and believe a man should take care of his wife and children, but if it is necessary or if she desires, then women should enter the workforce

 

If I am ever fortunate enough to earn a substantial yearly income that would allow my future wife to stay at home...that would be fine by me. However, I would rather my wife do something outside of the home...it isn't so much about money...but when the children are small...staying at home makes sense but as the children grow up...her overall role may lessen and I would want her to have something that she could pour her heart into besides the kids and the marriage.

Everyone needs something..whether it's work, hobbies, community service etc.

 

Great post Chosen and I agree - everyone needs something to pour their heart into.

If my man wanted to do something such as school or other such pursuits and this required me to support him - I would do it with a happy smile on my face.

 

:smt043 That's how I took his statement as well!

 

I agree 100%. I have worked very hard and as a result my wife has been able to not work for the last almost nine years and be home with our kids. Now that the kids are full-time in school and she has more time in her day, she is now considering doing something part-time (other than riding horses) to fill her day and put her undergrad and post-grad degrees to work. We are fortunate that we do not need her income to meet our goals so we are considering donating part of whatever she decides to make towards a worthy cause, and in this current recession there certainly are many in need.

This has been the best case scenario for our family, and I believe that their are many advantages to being able to have a spouse stay at home, but I know other families where both spouses have worked full time before and after kids and it works fine for them, what is best will vary depending on the family.

 

wow that's great Loki! that's how it should be, i think, even thought it's still very individual for every single family.