Real Attraction

I just can't seem to explain how it is that I'm strongly attracted to extremely dark-skinned black men..particularly from South Africa. I never imagined I would be with a black man as I'm a traditional, conservative Italian woman, yet I desire black African men like no other man!! My boyfriend is from Nigeria and he is absolutely GORGEOUS!!!! He is extremely dark-skinned and fit,muscular(with a awesomely cute bubble butt!! I can't stop grabbing it and squeezin' it!! lol) He is,without a doubt, the best lover I ever had!!! Although I was crazy about hot Italian guys for most of my life...they are not even close to black African men in terms of sexiness, lovemaking ability and physical endowments as well as style!! It's so funny that my black lover inspired a metaphor for when we are sexually intimate: it looks like a solar eclipse when he is on top of me!!

 

This bothers me...

I do believe we All have our preferences and you obviously have made it clear you have your's and we all discriminate in some form or fashion.

How many A-A men have you slept with before you met your man to come to your obvious physical attraction?

Curious minds want to know!

 

Would the same question be asked if a man said he preferred blondes to brunettes for example ? No I don't think anyone would ask if that man had slept with any blondes to be physically attracted to them; or how many he's slept with to come to his phyical attraction to them.

I just don't understand why when it comes to BM some have a problem with a WW saying that she prefers BM over white. It may be from experience and most often it is, but it could also be preference. We all have them. The person, I'm talking in general here, could have slept with a BM once to know what they want from then on in and what they are attracted to. The person also may not have slept with one BM to know that they are attracted to them physically. One has nothing to do with the other IMO.

 

I think what FreeOpen is saying is that you cannot generalize one ethnicity over another based on a single experience.

The blondes vs. brunettes analogy does quite fit, simply because we are not making character generalizations based on that physical characteristic. "Brunettes are smarter than Blondes" or "Blondes have more fun than Brunettes" or whatever. Had the original poster said she is attracted to her guy (not BM in general) based off of the experiences that she had with the Italian men she'd been with (not Italian men in general).

 

I think the issue that comes up with this and other posts like this is that it really sounds like someone who's been turned out.

Major sweeping generalizations. Of course all or even most black men are not the same...nor are all or most of any group.

I think that we as white women (including we Italian women ) don't want someone to be with us and/or lumped together simply because we are a ww. I've heard the same from many black men. Even if they might get jazzed about a woman preferring black men...they don't want someone to be interested in them simply because he is a black man.

When it all comes down to it, in the long run, we all want to be loved and appreciated for who and how we are and not objectified.

 

Bingo

 

I see your point but wouldn't it be obvious that the person is basing their decisions or opinions based on experiences she's had with Italian men she has been with and not the whole entire Italian male population.

I know that when I'm talking, sometimes I can say something to a similar effect; ie make a generalization about whatever/whoever when I actually mean just what I've encountered personally.

I think there's way too much political correctness. Each person's posts are their own opinions based on their own experiences. I don't think there needs to be to be a disclaimer.

 

I wish that were true, but it's not. On the internet with so many people with many different experiences on any given topic, combined with the various cultures, state of maturity, etc., etc.,. you will find that there are people who make broad generalizations based on limited experiences. I've found it best to be very specific when trying to get a point across, otherwise you risk the chance of others completely missing whatever message you are trying to get across.

EDIT: Of course everyone is entitled to their opinion, you just run the risk of offending some when you paint broad strokes of generalization.

 

Absolutely, I completely agree but I doubt that the original poster is only with black men because they are black and no other reason. I think any woman that is with a black man its because there are many reasons and yes the color of his skin can be one of them but not the sole reason.

Who would be with someone based only on the color of their skin ?!

 

I was instantly attracted to my 1st black bf. I had never been with a black man before him and I felt a strong attraction to him and that's the deep, passionate desire that I feel around him...I did not have any experience with black men before then. It was meant to be. That's how I feel about it.
I had only dated Italian men until I decided to try a black man.

 

I get it but why should it matter that much to someone else ? that's what I don't get ... why some people either take it too personally or make a big deal about it.

If a male poster would say they're only with WW because they're white it wouldn't make a load of difference to me.

 

I remember this italian chicks comment about her not liking black dudes till she slept with one

that tells you all you need to know

 

Serendipity:

I didn't say simply because of the color of the skin.

She listed quite a few things that are physical surface stuff...and quite frankly you have as well on some of your posts.

It's objectifying them. It is what it is. Some will be cool with that. Some will not. Every black man and white woman is an individual - do you really want to be grouped together with other white women saying you have a certain way about you, some sort of physical traits etc...simply because you are white?

Ok I just read your latest comment....so would it matter to you if a man was going on about being interested in you simply because you are white?

 

It matters only for the sake of conversation, really. I don't think anybody's been particularly aggressive in this thread, so there should be no caught feelings.

 

Ok so how does that translate to black men in general though? To me you are saying that you had a strong connection/attraction to one man. That man doesn't represent an entire race...but then I guess for you he did.

 

I guess I missed that. So I guess my take on her being turned out was spot on.

 

I think every poster so far in this thread has a valid point. I can pretty much see where everyone is coming from.

From my stand-point, I think it's beautiful when a WW declares her love and/or attraction to BM. I sometimes find some of her reasons suspect, though.

I guess one thing I need help understanding (seen this in other threads) is how WW.....who've only had one BM.....and who've never been into BM before.....can objectively claim they've now gone black and will never go back. Can they realistically expect that sex with every other BM from that point will be equally steamy? Now, if it's "the contrast" that played a role in revving up their sexual engines, then I can probably understand them claiming their conversion.......because that contrast is the one thing they'll probably come across with some kind of consistency (with any other BM they get with from that point forward).

 

Exactly how it was for me. I had never been with a black man, never even thought about it but for whatever reason the man came into my life, the opportunity was there and I took it.

I was not attracted to this man and consumed by desire because he was black; I was atracted to the man as a whole but he also happened to be black. The experience with this man changed my "preference" for lack of a better word and exploring further I believe I found what suits me = black men.

As with anything in life there always has to be a first.

 

Well, 'cock of the gods' is genetically encoded into our DNA., so the answer to your rhetorical question is 'yes'.

 

Well it should make a difference really, you are not just defined by your skin colour for your worth as a lover, girlfriend or wife same goes for a black man, its like saying any WW will do or any BM will do provided there white/ black its insulting, we all want to be valued for more than that even on the net IMO
Maybe you could term this as a more serious forum where we try to stay away from cliches, its a good laugh though if you stick around to find out