Ever feel guilty about dating a white woman??

Discussion in 'Conversations Between White Women and Black Men' started by SirNice, Jun 19, 2012.

  1. spiderdunk

    spiderdunk Member

    2 words...HELL NO!!!!!!
     
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  2. Beasty

    Beasty Well-Known Member

    First of all you would have to think race is real and if you do you're ignorant.

    I guess if you're brainwashed and it's your first time dating a ww you may feel guilty.

    Anyone with experience with ww would never feel guilty about "dating" one.
     
  3. orejon4

    orejon4 Well-Known Member

    Never felt guilty but I am aware of the disapproval or disappointment of others. Nothing that I can do about that, so it will have to be others’ problem to manage.
     
  4. spiderdunk

    spiderdunk Member

    You said that in a much more politically correct manner than I would have...LOL
     
  5. orejon4

    orejon4 Well-Known Member

    Well thank you, Spiderdunk. I think. Lol
     
  6. spiderdunk

    spiderdunk Member

    LOL...My fuse is very short these days when it comes to people who think they can tell me who to date/marry and who to vote for. The gloves are off! If they're bold and arrogant enough to think they can tell me who to love or how to vote, then I'm equally bold enough to tell them what I think...COMPLETELY UNFILTERED!!
     
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  7. orejon4

    orejon4 Well-Known Member

    I feel the same, and more so with each passing year.
     
  8. darkcurry

    darkcurry Well-Known Member

    My guilt lasted all of 5 minutes. lol. And the only reason I had it was because a long time ago I briefly felt for the argument that us dating white women hurts black women.
     
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  9. Bliss

    Bliss Well-Known Member

    Hurts how?
     
  10. darkcurry

    darkcurry Well-Known Member

    It's just an excuse for being anti-bm/ww. As a lot of people (unfortunately)do when they don't have proof they use stereotypes as their logic.
     
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  11. Bliss

    Bliss Well-Known Member

    Agree .
    I'm curious since you're in a relationship and most of us here are, or have been, in relationships, do you see (or still see) your girl's 'whiteness'? , or do you just see her. I mean, completely see just her, her race doesn't even enter into the equation in your relationship in your day today interactions. In other words is she just ______ , to you?
     
  12. The Dark King

    The Dark King Well-Known Member

    Do you because no one else is struggling with this bs. Not a single black woman sits up at night concerned about how their dating practices effects us as a group. My happiness is my business
     
  13. Bliss

    Bliss Well-Known Member

    Great post. Such a truism.
     
  14. DudeNY12

    DudeNY12 Well-Known Member

    The way I've heard it... The complaint is that it's already hard enough to find a good BM, and for some BM to date non-BW lessens the pool for them even more.

    Yup! I've actually had one BW say to me that she hates to see BM with WW, but it's OK for BW to date WM. Her (twisted) reasoning... Lots of BM already date WW, but most BW date BM exclusively.
     
  15. Soulthinker

    Soulthinker Well-Known Member

    Never regret a thing. Because the people who want a brother to regret it want to rule his life.
     
  16. darkcurry

    darkcurry Well-Known Member

    I see ALL of her... and that includes her beautiful skin color and tone, lovely eyes, and long flowing blonde hair. I don't get into the politics(especially the "politically correct" politics) and social construct of race nor do I let those things cloud my judgement of a person. It would also be unrealistic to how folks like to say "don't see color" because the fact is she is what we call "white" "caucasian" and "brown" "middle eastern". And I'am what we have labeled as "black" "african-american".

    Unfortunately we have to see each other's race in a cautionary way due to racism. We have encountered folks that don't like IR couples. We can't ignore that unfortunately because those things are a part of this society. But our relationship is filled with positivity about her "whiteness" and my "blackness". It can be done. :)

    But we understand some folks don't like IR couples seeing each other's "whiteness" and "blackness" so we are careful around others. Like for instance she loves my hair, but she makes sure not to touch it in public. lol.
     
  17. darkcurry

    darkcurry Well-Known Member

    Yeah I heard that one too. It's this "Queen" complex that makes that double standard somehow warranted. It all makes no sense when you peel back the layers. The point of love is to be with someone that is attracted to you as much as you are attracted to them. It's like why would you want someone to be with you out of guilt and pity... instead of a natural mutual attraction.
     
  18. orejon4

    orejon4 Well-Known Member

    I have felt that hostility, but apart from being aware for reasons of personal safety, I ignore what others think. I know it exists, but it doesn't guide my day to day thinking.
     
  19. Bliss

    Bliss Well-Known Member

    Very interesting.
    I know in public that as an IR couple, you can't help but be aware that you are an IR couple, because people looking at you remind you or situations can arise that remind you, I guess I was referring to when you're alone together... Do you just see her, the woman, and she just see you, the man, not as a black man, just her man.

    By the way, why can't she touch your hair in public, what is your hair like, tell us, we love hair here. :D
     
  20. Bliss

    Bliss Well-Known Member

    Right, l've heard that one too, which makes me wonder, and I'm curious what you think..
    If American Black men suddenly stopped dating WW and instead chose to exclusively date women who were from countries in Africa or the Carribean or India, etc, would the same BW still complain?
    Because I'm thinking if you're not choosing them personally, then you're guilty, et al?
     

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