Back in high school our head cheerleader and I would constantly flirt with each other, the two way attraction was obvious. Her Father/family was well known in the community. I asked her to the homecoming dance, and she literally broke down in tears in like 2 seconds flat, apologizing that her Father/family just would not let her date me because of my skin color. I did not know it, but she had already talked to her Dad before I even asked her, just to float the idea and he literally told her that it would be bad for his business if his clients "found out" his daughter was dating a Black guy. That's the kind of pressure im talking about. About 5 years ago we run into each other in the local mall when I was shopping with my daughter (she still looked great, imagine a blonde Ashley Judd look alike), after the usual chit chat and catching up, when we were about say goodbye, she gets a sad look on her face, looks at my daughter and says, she should have been her daughter, and just walked away.
She was twice divorced in that time so perhaps her regret was more about her dissatisfaction with her own life, the road not taken and all. I did have some splainin' to do later on that night when my daughter asked me at dinner time why that lady at the mall wanted to be her mommy, lol I did not think she was listening to our conversation, Mrs. Loki was not amused.
I think that's a good question. The focus is always on white women who end up dating IR later in life, but what about the Black men? What are their reasons?
People often create fantasies over things they wished would have happened. There are tons of stories of people going on FB (and other places) to find their long lost loves. Many end up reconnecting too. Often they don't work out.
Pffft...good luck with that. Them kids ain't loyal. Especially teenagers. They're loyal as long as you're the "cool parent" at any particular time of the day.....
I was almost 50 before I had the nerve to try different things. I always had attractions to other men but never really acted on the urges. When I actually did it I was amazed at what I felt
I've observed the opposite, younger ww seemed more interested, older ones either had no preference or were completely against it.
They age and realize you live once and the bullshit reasons that kept them from pursuing their true feelings don't apply anymore
End of college Soph yr college once I realized my high school relationship was ending.but I've met my share of 30-40+ women/mothers/divorcees in IR relationships in the 8-10 years since at family parties social outings double dates and whatever else. Been with 2 guys since one for 2.5 hrs the other been going strong for almost 5. I've met a lot who were stuck in bad relationships and the experience makes them realize happiness is the main thing. None of them say they purposely avoided black men but they admit that they considered the feelings and approval of parents, family, and those close to them when pursuing relationships was younger women. I wish I could provide empirical evidence and not anecdotal but this is just my personal experiences. Out of 12-15 women I'd say 8-10 felt that way.
How sad to see people living their lives based on the opinions of others. I love my family and friends dearly but have never held their views/opinions above my own because ultimately no one lives with my choices but me. Plus I'm a tad controlling so I'd never give up control of my happiness to another lol.
I give women in that age group a pass. I grew up in working class, mostly white area. Went to an all white high school back in the early to mid 80's. Let me tell you, the pressure these girls faced for dating a black guy was crazy. One girl went against her father and dated my boy. Her family actually had her committed. Lots of girs wanted to, but just couldn't take the chance. Think about it, you're a teenager who never gets into trouble, makes good grades but you know for a fact that your family will totally disown you for dating outside of your race. What are you going to do? Things were changing back then, but it was nowhere near as tolorant as it is today. So, if they want to wait until later in life, welcome aboard.
