"One drop rule"

He just loves saying that any time bw are held up to any scrutiny

 

Sigh.
So the ww who stated the same POV are wrong?
So when they were on those dates they were just imagining things?

You are always talking matriarchy in the black community so let's talk.I asked you before why it happened and you didn't know . you had no idea what a patriarchy meant but you wanted but you dont want the responsibility of it.

Smh.

 

When you read what the women here have been saying about the men they have dated, you will see that a lot of men have express animosity toward bw.
Read the women's experience.
http://www.whitewomenblackmen.com/forum/showthread.php?t=14601
In this forum the lowest of the low we had a guy say bw had an online party celebrating Steve McNair's death. When asked to show it, well let's say in the end we knew he lied
Now you can say they feel entitled to but why do you think they feel that way? Why do you think they feel angry about bm dating outside their race?

Then we also talked about the matriarchal aspect of it. The forum talks often of that. I asked several times when and why it became one? My guess it came due to LBJ time when he waged war on poverty. The policy pushed bm out the home and bw took over. It snowballed from there.
http://atlantablackstar.com/2014/12/24/ways-war-poverty-destroyed-black-fatherhood/7/

 

I said why the matriarchy existed because of institutional racism and you agreed. Did you take your pills this morning?

 

That's after I made that point. Do you want me to pull up your past posts or do you want to have an adult convo

I have asked you several times in the past how and when matriarchy happened and you stated you didn't know.

So please stop deflecting and let's talk about the matriarchy and why the bm versus bw thing and why bw hate seeing bmww IR

 

Well, I am sorry to hear that people are throwing bw under the bus. But, I think it is ok and important to address issues of entitlement as well as issues affecting both the black and white communities and how those issues intersect and affect bm and ww relationships.

As far as the reason why certain black women feel entitled to black men... hmmmm...

Well, one might give the excuse that it is in an effort to support solidarity among black men and women. But, you can have solidarity without having to date or marry someone of the same group. So, that excuse isn't really a valid one. I've seen many polls and studies about black women being considered to be the least desirable on dating websites. I am not sure how well that translates in the real world considering over 90% of married black men are married to black women.

But, if the desirability of black women isn't there then maybe that is reason to feel as though they should be given a chance. However, that contradicts feminism and black feminism's view of "friend zoning". The belief is that the "friend zone" doesn't exist and just because you are considered an undesirable male (maybe overweight, low income, nerdy, etc.) that happens to be kind and friendly to a woman, doesn't mean that she owes you a date, or sex, or marriage. The idea is that just because a man is supportive of you as a friend or ally, and gives you unsolicited assistance and kindness, doesn't mean you owe him anything. If he feels you owe him something, then he is suffering from an entitlement issue. Because the reality is that the woman didn't ask for any of it and isn't obligated to reciprocate the same feelings.

I happen to agree with that opinion. This is where we run into a double standard. Because certain black women will claim to provide the same kind of unsolicited kindness, support, and or desire for attractive, rich, successful, and or desirable black men. Yet, will simultaneously expect their desire to be reciprocated. This is an entitlement issue on a racial front. It is an unfortunate reality.

I am not entirely sure where the entitlement started, but it certainly goes unchecked in the media, black media, the black community, as well as black feminist circles. I believe it is something that needs to be addressed.

 

Damn dropping knowledge like a damn bomb. Never even considered that aspect of the entitlement perspective but you're so right. Because it only becomes an issue when it's someone they desire then you hear guilt trip diatribes about how they went through slavery and Jim crow with us and as a result "deserve " a good black man. They're only talking about the Shemars and Idris Albas of the world. No one is crying when it's Cedric the entertainer or CLO minus the money and fame.

 

You make a good point.

Years ago... listening to Tom Joyner's morning show and the topic was dating and finding good guys. A young lady called in, and she identified herself as an African-American 20something. She went on to say that what's a woman to do because "there's no good black men" to date. One of the co-hosts (a female) interrupted (clearly annoyed at the woman's statement) and proceeded to tell the woman that... She refuse entertain that argument as there's plenty of good men available, but they're often being passed over and/or turned down because they don't have money, perfect body and striking good looks.

 

Can you explain how you draw that conclusion? I don't understand the connection.

 

Part of the welfare system that was mostly concentrated in urban centers where blacks live did not allow a family to receive welfare assistance if an able body man was in the home creating incentive for women to be single mothers making them head of the household while pushing black men out. So children grew up with their mothers being in charge unlike nearly every group where it's the male.

 

Pretty much. It's a very young minded mentality. There's an incredibly immature mindset within our community where grown people are still looking for superficial shit like they're teenagers. Maybe if people looked for charter and growth with someone there would be far less single mothers in our community

 

MKM's posts regarding entitlement make a lot of sense.

 

I agree that it's immature but it's not an exclusively black problem. We're just more open about it; I see a lot of hispanic, asian, and white women who still have a high school approach to dating. Good luck finding a quarterback when your 32 living in the inner city lmao.

 

It still goes on too. Some areas are getting a bit better. I know in Sacramento the work requirements for those receiving benefits are almost the same for those with one parent in the home vs. those with two. But then many complain that this just promotes one parent not working.

 

You're right, it's not just a Black problem. It's also not just a problem with younger people. It's amazing how many older people are still out there doing the same things. It's a maturity issue.

 

I agree the entitlement mentality is there. I believe that they're looking at the shortage of men to marry. They look at the high rate of black men in jail. They also look at black men in homosexual relationships. As far as the marriage rate I think you're right it's 90% by the time they are 55 years old but you also have to look at the high divorce rate at 70%. I'm not sure hi they factor the 70% because some people may get married 2 & 3 times so you have to take that percentage with a grain of salt. And I think that 70% if I'm correct it's just merica had a hole I'm not sure if it's that people specifically to be honest. So they feel as though there is a shortage of black men. Also as you state there are the factors of solidarity. With those factors you get the phenomena what I like to call the BBW ( bitter black woman).

I'm not condoning how they view interracial relationships in regards to black men and white women I'm just saying that's why they're angry. But its no different than a wm being upset at a ww dating a bm. Racist is racist....



I have always told women (I told this before here in the forum a bw got mad at tiger woods when he married. I asked her "aren't you a christian. Since you stated yes then you need to read numbers chapter 12. It states G-d is cool with IR and anyone against it is cursed. " needless to say she was pissed.

Lesson 90% bw go to church...site that scripture and you'll back em up".

With All that being said a bm must also realize that bw don't date IR at the rate bm do . they will and have pledge their loyalty to bm. That's another reason they are upset. I have said here and before. ...go date a wm. Find happiness where you can.

 

You noticed another bw stated that not a bm

You are welcome

 

Exactly

 

True but I see more relaxing those standards to settle down and have a family. I still see bw in their 30s screaming where the ballas at

 

The only real major problem with all this is that dudes should constantly raise their kids.
Otherwise we will get knuckleheads this man discuss
http://www.thegameissoldnottold.com/black-women-are-raising-bitch-ass-niggaz/