Interesting article from a Black man on dating White women

People always want to link up based on some perceived similarities, but egos and nonsense always seem to win out. I say just look after you and yours the best you can, and if we all do the same, the environment will improve by default

 

Outstanding K!! I would encourage you to reach out to your local 4H or Pony Club members if you or your group is interested in learning more about horses and the myriad of opportunities and career options that can stem from equines. Both groups can earn valuable civic service/volunteer time that is part of their yearly requirements by offering education to groups.

 

I hear what you are saying Ra, I enjoy the debates around here when they are civil, constructive, and both parties are truly seeking to understand an different viewpoint. However far too many "debates" turn into flame/insult wars especially when the topics are controversial, difficult and nuanced. I do try to post threads that will generate positive debate on IR related topics, we have such intelligent and accomplished members from all walks of life here, a lot of collective wisdom to be shared...lets all continue to lead by example.

 

*Chuckle*, I think a few members of both genders fit this profile...

 

Right, I did 4H with the older kids. We had a small ranch and did a LOT of community outreach. There is a homeschooler group going on across town now working with the suburban kids with small animals. They've been really trying to make a showing at any and all events the various charters are having. I'm going to start asking some of the animal 4Hers in the outlying rural area to come out to our events on this side. Or even if some would do an open ranch like yesterday. I got to see that so many of the kids just didn't have any experience and just wanted to look or pet an animal.

Most of the families in our area don't even venture out on farms/ranches...even though it's rural about 10 mins away! Clearly they had no problem coming out when I set up a fun event though. So, definitely going to do a lot more of that!

I'm going to set something up with UCDavis too. Years ago we did a tour of part of the med and vet school it was awesome, my now grown kids still remember it.

I was more jazzed yesterday though because there was such a mix of kids. As you know, often times with ranch stuff (especially horses) it's mostly white kids.

I'm also setting up more and more museum, art show, science center get togethers for them. They were all pretty excited about those ideas yesterday. And those are all things I do with my kids frequently. We have a wealth of resources here, but often when you grow up with it around you then you forget and don't take advantage of it. Plus many of the parents did't know about all the deals they can get and figure it's costly. I'm seeing that a lot of people just don't think about it or know how to go about doing such things.

Back OnT. I think it really is possible to create a shift by doing simple things and they expand into something bigger and greater. It doesn't always have to be a big huge mission to start with. If I want a stronger sense of community with more IR families...I go to places where there are more IR families, or I can create my own activities and events. Not going to wait for someone else to decide what we can or can't do.

 

@darkcurry Have you tried Facebook? I was watching a couple YouTube videos last week & they mentioned there were a bunch of IR Facebook groups. I went to check them out, but most of them were Private.

 

Not on facebook and it seems like some of them want you to join in order to view them.

 

As my daughter moves up the ranks in competitive jumping events, (quick brag here, she is county champion for her class!) I have lost count of how many times we have been the only IR family, no other diversity at all, although in the recent years I have noticed more Asian girls competing. That is why our group does a lot of outreach to all communities when we do our horse education public service events. The look on kids eyes, the first time they see, touch, get to learn about the physiology, eating habits, care, ect., and most excitingly, get to ride horses is beyond measure. They are always amazed to know that horse manure most likely fertilized much of the food they eat on a daily basis, as well as emerging power sources that are based only on horse manure (http://www.tbo.com/news/plant-turns-horse-manure-into-methane-powering-generator-73553), the important need to protect our wild horses from shrinking habitat, the important need to care for and protect horses of all breeds once they are done racing, ect. There are endless important and fascinating topics to connect kids and horses.

 

Congrats to your daughter!

Yes exactly...the woman's ranch we went to - her teaching is all that, which is why I wanted to take the kids there. I want them to be introduced and experience the whole process. Yesterday many of them touched a horse for the first time. Some were scared and then ended up coming around. They were able to feed a bit and such. She had one that's really great and lets little kids touch all different parts so they could see how different things feel. I took pictures and they were all wanting their pictures taken with the horses. It was priceless! She has a wild mustang on the property too, and a lesson horse that was born blind. My inbox has been blowing up this morning from all the parents telling me how their kids came home and were so excited. They were all excited just to see 2 chickens and ducks that were there and see the chickens eggs were brown, and one lays double yolk eggs. Things I don't think twice about and forget that so many don't have any experience of.

I'm not even much of a horse person (I know, I'm ducking). My girls have both liked to "joy" ride and we did have a horse when we had the ranch. Actually my boys rode too but more just enough to learn about horses and move on. We had a lot of other animals, many exotics too.

It showed me how important it really is to be bringing things like this to kids in suburban and urban areas. Definitely have some ideas swirling that we'll be putting into action. Good point about the retired racing horses too....there's a place not far that takes them in.

Not surprised that its less and less diverse as they move up the ranks. Horses are a very expensive hobby as well as a huge commitment.

 

I say all that and then I get a message posted about it from one of the bw who went off about how it was really disappointing and her kids didn't get to ride the horses and they didn't provide lunch and complained about the snacks that were there (the ranch owner put out some snacks - which she certainly did NOT have to do) Never mind that the posting for the event stated they wouldn't be riding and they would be "meeting the horses" and hanging out and meeting the instructors. She also complained about it being an "advertisement for lessons and camps" because parents were asking for the information and the ranch owner was answering questions.

where's the eye roll smiley

Fing cant please some people and you are giving them something for FREE. That right there though, that attitude is why so many decide to not bother.

 

I hear you LOUD and CLEAR on that K, for some people, no good deed will go unpunished. Please know that I and im sure others give you MUCH respect and praise for taking time out of your day to organize an event that clearly touched many young lives for the better! Its people like you that make the world a better place, WELL DONE.

 

Thanks! As a good friend says - there has to be THAT bitch in every group!

 

I know this was not addressed to me, but a view on facebook, and why I might not choose facebook, is that if someone has family members who do not support interracial relationships and they are connected on facebook, then the disapproving family members would see another's facebook page and see that they support interaccial relationships.

Ok, that was awkward, to put it another way, if I have family who do not support interracial relationships, and I am connected with them among my facebook network and also connected to an interracial community, this would not work because my family and I often look at facebook together to see what our friends are doing, and they look at my facebook page too, and if they saw the interracial stuff, it would cause problems.

Unfortunately for this purpose, Facebook lacks some privacy for me.

Hope that makes sense.

 

People will always think whatever they want to think. Whoever wants to be in an interracial relationship has to decide not to bother with it, not to waste time with it and not to give it space in his head.
Germans are not very confrontational so they rather gossip about you than say something to your face.
However, I know very well what they are all thinking: that my husband is an asylum seeker who married me only for papers and will dump me and the kids as soon as he has said papers. Doesn't apply at all to our case, but actually happens on a daily basis. I also know what the black women are thinking, he doesn't really love her, he just had to marry her because of papers and will dump her after in order to marry a "real wife" (read African woman) who "knows how to take care of him". Like I said, they rarely say anything to your face, but if they do, whether white or black, I give them a piece of my mind. Recently a Nigerian woman after getting to know me "confessed" (her words) to me that she had been telling my husband to "leave that oyinbo woman and marry from the house" (meaning his tribe)...