Well, Melirosa, I guess some of us (men) deserve your scorn. I cannot speak for other men, but for me, when I encountered my first interracial contact, it was different experience based on a history that I knew that it was forbidden to be with her, it was scary, because of my expectations of her as being superior in her outlook of life than myself, and it was exciting, because she was just different. I had to know if that first contact with a white female was a novelty or was she just like any other woman. In my case, you have to understand the time frame (the 1970's). You have to also understand our psychic of what it means to be a black man in a sexual relationship for the first time with a white woman. The fact that its forbidden to be with her, the fact that she is willing to be with you, just the act of "being alone" with her and for her to be yours for the first time in your life, when you been told all your life not to be with her. I guess what I'm trying to say, yes it may be like a kid (for some of us) in a candy store at first, but if you were told not to eat the candy for so long, you want it more than ever, until you get that aching tooth and do not want candy anymore. ~ Roberto

By Melirosa (208.166.11.98) on Friday, February 2, 2001 - 02:08 pm:

roberto-
interesting post. so you guys are like big kids in a candy store so to speak? men are funny creatures. they feel the need to go around and experience everything to be absolutely positive that when they enter into a committed relationship/marriage, they can be sure in their minds that have sampled from all the fruits on the tree and they aren't left wondering about if they could have done better. that dates back to the caveman days when men had that "wandering instinct". women are so opposite (for the most part beacause there are exceptions to every rule) we are less inclined to "wander" and we don't feel the need to sample every type man under the sun in order to settle down. funny how are minds are created so differently, but somehow it all meshes together in the end. i don't think we will ever fully understand each other though.

By Roberto (152.163.201.63) on Friday, February 2, 2001 - 12:15 pm:

I do not need a television show like "Temptation Island" to know the tremendous temptations that are out there. Forrest Gump had a famous line, "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you are going to get". This is very true for me as a black man. I get tempted every day. I can imagine the lure that many black men feel from a world of white women. Women who come in all temperments, histories, cultures, various hair colors (blonds to red heads to brunettes). Is it little wonder why so many black men tend to stray. I have been guilty of this as well. Like one of my friends (a handsome single successful black male who is being pursued by a black woman and a white woman, I wonder which one will get him first?), a black man have told me, before he gets involved with any woman, especially white women, a black man need to get the desire for other women out of his system. It would mean to (sow his oats, without pregnancies of course) experience life with other women first, and than be committed to one woman. As he reasoned, a black man getting involved with a white woman, especially for the first time need to experience other white women first, before he commits, because the temptations to try others is too great. When you are around attractive women you need to build in youself a sense of sexual fullfillment, and satisfaction met, and when you do meet that significant other, be for her and her alone and know one else. ~ Roberto